From a Child's Perspective!

It's amazing to me the wonder of a child's perspective on things. Oh to be able to see the world through their lens!!

I was reading this blog post to my mom on Thanksgiving when I realized that Chloe was listening in. She was taking it all in and I believe, experiencing the pain all over again. I wasn't trying to be insensitive, I just didn't realize the impact on her little life and forgot, for a moment, that she, too, endured some tough nights as we prayed for a miracle.. for her daddy.

Unbeknownst to me, she's been writing a story, similar to mine, only from a 10-year-old's perspective and I'd like to share it with you, exactly how it was written in her own handwriting, spelling errors and all! I think it will touch your heart...

This is My Story (by Chloe Bender)
I will never forget my last Christmas. My dad had just went on a work trip and was spost to be there for a week or so. So we knew he was going to be home in time for Christmas or so we thought. He called us to tell us he was not feeling well. He thought it was some bad Mexigain food he had the night before. The next thing I know is that called us the next day to say that he had gone to the hospital. Three days later we left to go to Arazona where he had been staying. When we got there I could not go in because of the H1N1 but the sichuation was so bad the nurse came downstairs. I got upstairs and the nurse said I had to go back down. I thought it did not make any sense. Every day we went there. Finally my dad called us and said I could come in his room. I went there and as soon as I walked in that room I could tell he loved me!! I still had to wear a mask because of the H1N1. I felt safe and warm with my dad in that hospital bed. That night in the hotel I felt lost, and alone. The next say when I went to see him again it was wonderful. Then came Christmas and me and my mom were in my dads hospital room eating a big Christmas dinner, and my dad is there eating jello. That night before me and my mom had went to go get my dad a stocking and a Christmas tree. He opened his stocking with joy and happiness. That night I was in the hotel again and felt a lot more safe. My dad got better and out of the hospital, but could not go o the plain yet. So it then felt like we were on a vacation. When we got home our house had been cleaned by some friends and we had cookies and wine on the table and presents under the tree! My cousin bought me a dress. I was so thank-ful for safety and just about everything else. And that's my story!

Oh how I love that girl!! Reading this has been a gentle reminder of the tenderness and sweetness of our children. THEY have a voice too and even when we think they couldn't possibly be mature enough to handle certain situations - they surprise us with a unique perspective on life and love.

Mark 10:13... “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these."

Discovering God's Purpose

Finding God's purpose for your life! Do you ever feel as overwhelmed by this as me? I find myself constantly dissatisfied with what I'm doing. Okay - maybe not truly "dissatisfied" as much as "restless" about the purpose and direction God has for me. I think it has a lot to do with my impatience.

I find myself continually praying a prayer that goes a little something like this, "God, please show me the plan and purpose You have for my life. Reveal Your will to me. Show me the unique destiny You have created just for me."

But here is how I think it comes out (or at least how my heart is revealed through this petition), "God, please (pretty please) show me the plan and purpose you have for my life (as soon as possible). Reveal Your will to me (making it as comfortable as You can please). Show me the unique destiny you have created just for me (and if you can do this by next Monday, that would be just perfect)."

Does anyone else feel as though SOMETIMES this is how your prayers really sound like?

I have good intentions. I really do. I believe my motives are right. After all - the sooner the plan and purpose is revealed to me - the sooner I can get on with making a real difference in this world.

But... God is not interested in giving us what we want when we want it. I believe He's more interested in giving us what we need when we need it. In other words - in His timing.

Because I have become quite obsessed in recent years with discovering God's purpose for my life, I have purchased just about every book on the subject I can get my hands on. So much so that I've often chuckled upon checking out at the bookstore glancing across the book titles I have chosen... 'A Call To Die', 'Redefining My Identity', 'You', 'Its Not About Me', 'Gifted To Lead', 'My Destiny' and just about every book ever written by the great John Maxwell!

Honestly... I've become a regular self-help junkie who sincerely longs for the "Ah Ha!" moment to arrive.

Over the past few months I have been on a journey. Scratch that, a roller coaster really. A roller coaster of emotions. A roller coaster of dreams and desires. And I really feel like God is revealing some things to me. And I am SUPER excited about the direction He is leading. I really am. But we're not there yet... and so, my spirit is still... restless.

I picked up a short booklet the other day by Beth Moore entitled, "Discovering God's Purpose For Your Life" (well - of course I did!). The booklet is only 58 (short) pages long, but WOW - chock full of all sorts of wonderful nuggets of inspiration! The entire booklet is centered around one passage of scripture... Philippians 3:10 (Amplified)... "My determined purpose is that I may know Him, that I may progressively become more deeply and intimately acquainted with Him, perceiving and recognizing and understanding the wonders of His person."

Here are some of my highlights from the book:

He is determined to purse you because He knows the greatest joy in your life will come from His plan for you.

You and I were created to be a people who seek purpose.

If you are to live out God's purpose for your life, you must come to a place where you determine a focus for your life.

Our determined purpose is to know God.

Giving your life to knowing Christ more intimately is worth it because of the wonders of His person. Sadly, we don't believe this because we have compared and measured Christ according to a human standard.

We will never to able to fulfill our purpose if we do not turn from our practices of sin.

We stay tucked in our offices, drive in and curse the traffic, get overwhelmed by the rush of life and never look up to behold the sunset before us and shout to God, "What glory! What a glory we behold!"

We can know who He is even when we don't have a clue what He's doing.

God is not going to forget our concerns. God knows what worries you. God knows what scares you nearly to death! God knows what's on your mind... let it be on His.

Beth also quotes George Bernard Shaw...

"This is the true joy in life, the being used for a purpose recognized by yourself as a mighty one... the being a force of nature instead of a feverish, selfish little clod of ailments and grievances complaining that the world will not devote itself to making you happy."

WOW! That pretty much sums it up, doesn't it? Talk about IN your FACE!?

Beth suggests in this small little booklet that you begin to discover your purpose by being most concerned with KNOWING God. She even suggests that you consider thinking about your own book - of life. On the front of your book is a title and that title should be the same for all of us... "Knowing God". Then under the title would be a line that says, "by..." with your name name. Now.. every single chapter of that book should be focused on that ONE thing... Knowing God. Period.

She wraps it up by encouraging us to think about what our chapter right now would be called. Maybe it's.. 'Knowing God - Through the Storm'. Maybe it's... 'Knowing God - Through my Infertility'. Whatever it is - it HAS to begin with Knowing God.

What God really spoke to my heart as I read this booklet was that His timing is perfect - and I that I need to continue to seek to KNOW Him better. Perhaps God is not quite ready to use me for the purpose He's created me for, but it doesn't mean He's finished and it's certainly not time to give up on pursuing a deeper, richer and fuller relationship with Him.

I believe to be as effective as I can for the calling He's chosen for me, I have to commit to Knowing Him more. And by Knowing Him more, I will be closer to discovering the thing that He's created me to do for Him.

I believe you cannot begin to know the plan and purpose He has for you, until you are willing to get serious about Knowing Him more. I've determined that even though the intentions of desiring to know His plan and purpose may sound sincere, we can twist and turn it into something more selfish by demanding we know before it's our time to know.

I was just talking to someone today and I explained it this way, "I'm very impatient when it comes to knowing what God has in store for me. It's like I've started the bus and I'm outside of it screaming, 'Come on let's go, let's go!'. My intentions are good, my motives are right, but God's telling me to turn off the engine! It's not time yet." Just because I want to know (right now) doesn't mean I'm ready to know (quite yet).

But, in the meantime, I'm going to spend my time getting to Know God better!

I believe - the best is YET to COME!

Chicken Noodle Casserole

One of my all time favorite comfort foods is Tuna Noodle Casserole. Chloe likes it too. However, it's not one of Trevor's favs. So - since we are a chicken family primarily, I decided to change it up a bit and incorporate chicken instead of tuna - made the same way I've always made it with tuna.

Chicken Noodle Casserole

2 chicken breasts (poached and shredded)
1 can of cream of mushroom soup
1 can of cream of chicken soup
1 c bread crumbs (I like to use Panko breading)
1 c shredded cheese (I use cheddar)
1 c broccoli (chopped into small pieces)
1/2 c milk (I like to use Half and Half)
6 small squares of butter
1/2 pound (approx) Penne pasta noodles (This is our family's favorite noodle)

Poach the chicken breasts for approximately 10 minutes on medium-high heat until cooked through. (Chicken should be 180 degrees with meat thermometer.)

Shred the chicken using a fork and then sit in a bowl to cool for a bit.

Cook the Penne pasta for approximately 10 minutes in boiling water. (I like to use the pasta when it's still al dente and not too soft. The sauce tends to stick better that way.)

In a separate bowl, combine the soups, bread crumbs, cheese and broccoli until well combined. Add the chicken to the bowl. Stir. Add the pasta to the bowl. Stir. I finish the dish off by adding the milk. This is just to bind everything together. Using Half and Half will make it a little richer and thicker. Add enough so that the noodles won't be hard, but not so much that your dish is drowning in the liquid.

Place all of the ingredients in a greased 9x12 pan. Add the squares of butter to the top.

Bake at 350 for approximately 20-25 minutes until golden bubbly.

Serve.

Hope you enjoy!! :)

Christmas Traditions

I LOVE LOVE LOVE Christmastime! What a wonderful time of the year! I have always believed that the entire month of December is... just... magical!

I was thinking the other day about Christmas traditions. We all have them. And maybe some we aren't even aware of. Here are some of ours:

We always put out Christmas tree up the day after Thanksgiving. Always. I can't even allow myself to compromise on this one. It simply MUST be up. Heck - it's hard enough for me to wait THAT long!

For years Chloe and I have gone out Thanksgiving weekend to pick out a new snow globe to add to her growing collection and a new tree ornament. It's been pretty fun to see some of the ones she's chosen over the years! One year it was a pink star, one year it was a cow sitting on a log and this year it was a light-up angel. :)

For the past few years Chloe and I have decorated a ginger bread house. It's a hoot to see! Frosting everywhere. Fun memories!

Throughout the month of December we read Christmas stories from various Christmas books we've collected over the years. Some include devotions, which are fun for Chloe.

We host a Cookie Baking Day with our friends the middle of December. This is an old tradition that my family used to do when my grandmother was alive and we just re-vamped it and included it in our new traditions last year. SO much fun!

This is a little silly - but growing up we had a Golden Retriever as our family pet. We (Trevor, Chloe and myself) now have one in our family. They are indeed our favorite little creatures. So - each year I purchase my mom a new Golden Retriever calendar for the new year. Silly tradition - but it's still a tradition, right?

On Christmas Eve, our family's tradition is to drive around town looking at all the Christmas lights. We LOVE to drive with the windows down, blankets tucked around our bodies warming up with a thermos of hot chocolate oohing and ahhing over the house and yard displays.

Every year, two days before Christmas, we bake and decorate a birthday cake for Jesus. During our families dinner on Christmas afternoon, we sing Happy Birthday to our Savior. What a sweet time this is!

Special notes...

We have five Christmas trees: Two in our living room, one in our entry way (Chloe's tree decorated with recycled Happy Meal toys), one in our master bedroom and one on our front porch.

I'm obsessed with snowmen!

Oh - and I DO start listening to Christmas music in mid November.

Stockings in our family have always been a BIG deal. They usually include a variety of candies, books, magazines, perfumes, lip glosses, gum and small pieces of jewelry wrapped and sitting alongside of the stocking demanding to be opened first. :)

Christmastime... for sure the MOST WONDERFUL time of the year!!

What are some of YOUR Christmas Traditions?? I would love to hear about them!

Lord... hear our cries

Our family, along with thousands of other families throughout Lenawee County and surrounding cities, has been praying diligently for the three missing boys from Morenci. We have had our eyes and ears glued to the news hoping and praying for a report that these little guys have been recovered. We have been praying against all hope as the latest news reports suggest that what happened to these young, beautiful life-filled boys is nothing more than profoundly tragic.

During the last 5 days my thoughts have turned to my own family. My daughter Chloe. My husband Trevor. Tucking my sweet little one into her own warm bed at night has had more significance. Dropping her off to school in the morning has had a little different feel to it. Perhaps my embraces have been tighter. Maybe I've stared a little longer into her eyes and Lord knows I've prayed a little extra for her lately... for protection, for guidance and for a deep relationship with Jesus.

But... as a believer I know that regardless of the outcome - God is still GOOD and He is still in control! He still has a plan and purpose for that family and whether we choose to believe it now or not... He is working all things together in accordance with His will.

We may not understand this side of heaven the answer to that one single question... "Why?" but maybe, just maybe, we weren't meant to know. Just yet.

Jesus knows a little... no... a LOT about suffering. He's felt more anguish than anyone should ever know - and I believe when we grieve... He also grieves.

Let's continue lifting these little ones up in prayer. Let's pray for peace, comfort and protection for their families and for the rescue workers serving so selflessly to put and end to this tragedy.

But let's not forget to Praise Him in this storm. For He is who He is no matter where we are or what we are going through.

Ephesians 1:11b "...He makes everything work out according to His plan."

Recipe Friday - a day late!

Oops - - too busy putting up Christmas Tree yesterday to remember about posting on the blog. ;)

Here is this week's recipe... courtesy of a friend of mine. I'm so addicted to these things it's scary. Good Christmas-time dessert.

ENJOY!

Special K Bars

Ingredients

1 cup white sugar
1 cup light corn syrup
1 cup peanut butter
6 cup Special K Cereal
1 cup butterscotch chips
1 cup chocolate chips



Directions
Boil the sugar and the corn syrup at a full boil for 30 seconds, stirring constantly. Stir in the peanut butter. At this point either stir in the special K (if you used a large pot) or pour the mixture over the special K cereal in a mixing bowl. Place the cereal mixture in a well greased 9 X 13 pan. Melt the butterscotch and chocolate chips together and pour over the cereal mixture. Eat whenever you desire.

Notes: For easy cutting, let cool for an hour or so and then cut them all up. Do not smooth or compact the special K mixture or topping more than the minimum required to spread it.

Number of Servings: 24

A Note on THANKfulness...

It was almost a year ago that our family's world was... forever changed.

It was mid December when my husband, Trevor, was called away on business to Arizona. I wasn't too happy about him leaving in the middle of what was a very hectic and BUSY Christmas season for us here in Michigan, but I knew he had to go. It was only supposed to be a 3 day trip. He left on a Tuesday and was supposed to be back on Friday afternoon. No big deal. There and back.

But, God had different plans.

I don't know if you're like me, but there are times when... I just don't "feel right" about a situation. And this was one of those times. I remember the morning he left for the airport. He had left just moments before we had and as we turned left and he turned right, I remember thinking about how much I loved him and how much we were going to miss him. Anyone who knows me - knows I am pretty sentimental about these sorts of separations, but this one... this time... it just... felt different.

Two days into his trip I received a phone call from him saying that he was going to have to stay an extra 2 or 3 days in Phoenix. Apparently, there were some problems on one of the vehicles they were up-fitting and this was going to require an extra stay.

I was bummed. This meant that he wasn't going to be able to do last minute Christmas shopping with me and it also meant that I was solely responsible for all of the final Christmas arrangements that needed to be made. Shoot!

On Friday morning I received a phone call from Trevor asking me what he should take for an upset stomach. "I think I had some bad Mexican food or something" he said when he called to ask me whether he should take, "Pepto or Kaopectate?"

We finished the conversation with him telling me he was going back to the hotel to go to bed for the night. I should have known then - that something wasn't quite right... it was only 5 o'clock in the afternoon!

After a rough night of sleep, he woke up not feeling any better. In fact - he was worse! So - after MUCH encouragement (okay... persisting) from me, he decided to go to the hospital to "get checked out".

Boy - am I glad he did.

My husband was having a diverticulitis attack and this time - it was more severe then the other times he'd had them. So much to the point of needing to be hospitalized immediately and consulting with a physician about surgery!

Surgery! I thought to myself. This is a man who can't even remember the last time he had BLOOD DRAWN. This is a man who's not a fan of needles and dreads the mere thought of a doctors office! How can we be talking SURGERY?!

You know - God is SOO good. I believe sometimes He keeps us from knowing certain things that will ultimately cause us worry or grief. And let me just say right now - I am MOST thankful that I didn't know the severity of His diagnosis until after I arrived in Arizona!

After consulting with the doctors, it was determined that my dear husband was in very bad shape. What we would later learn is that he had a perforated bowel and was "septic"... an extremely dangerous situation that has a very slim survival rate. The fever that had been so bad for 2 days was a warning sign that his body was in grave danger and had he NOT arrived when he did... he may very well have not survived the next 24 hours.

On December 21 my daughter and I arrived in Phoenix, Arizona via a 7 p.m. flight from Detroit. During that flight, Trevor would be undergoing major surgery (second only to open heart surgery).

For some strange reason I was peaceful. I knew he was in good hands and I knew that by the time we would arrive at the hospital, this ordeal would all be behind us. We could then get on with a "normal" Christmas.

Once again, God had different plans.

We arrived at Chandler Regional Medical Center at just after midnight on December 22. Because of the H1N1 scare, all children under the age of 13 were not allowed inside the hospital without special permission from the house supervisor or at the bare minimum a face mask and NO child was getting past the first floor. This made it very difficult for us as Chloe was only 9. However, after some persistence and discussion with the house super, we were allowed to go up to see daddy (who we were told was on the fourth floor) as long as she kept her mask on and never left my side. To make her feel less "funny looking" with her mask on, I decided to put one on too. We looked like quite a pair, and certainly daddy would think we were silly and get a good chuckle from it too!

The ride up the elevator to the fourth floor was one of the longest of my life. I was so excited to see my husband recovering nicely or even just sleeping peacefully.

When the doors to the elevator opened up there were 2 nurses standing side by side to greet us. What I remember more clearly then anything else is that they both looked at Chloe as though they were surprised to see her. As we laughed and joked about our masks, it didn't seem to change the seriousness of the look on their faces. And that felt... really odd.

I remember... I was nervous at this point. Why weren't they laughing too?

Almost immediately one of the nurses took me by my arm and said something to me I don't think I will ever forget. She said, "Mrs. Bender, we need to talk to you in private please."

At the same time, the other nurse was taking my 9-year-old to the nurses station with her. I remember looking into the eyes of my sweet little girl with a mask on trying to keep it together for her without breaking down myself from the anxiety and discontent that was welling up inside of me. Hearing those words were indeed not what I was expecting to hear and certainly unprepared to handle.

The nurse led me down the longest hallway of my life. And I remember I began arguing with her to tell me that was wrong. "WHAT is it?" I begged her repeatedly as the tears flowed and the nervousness turned to overwhelming fear.

"Mrs. Bender, I'm not the nurse who was in with your husband during surgery, and I'm not sure I understand all that happened, but there were some complications and your husband isn't yet awake from the surgery."

As she continued, my heart sank. "After the procedure we took him to a regular recovery room where we take patients following surgery. At some point he became unresponsive and so we had to re-intabate him and he is currently downstairs in ICU."

I'm telling you now - NOTHING could have prepared me for hearing these words. Nothing.

I don't even remember exactly what happened next, except for them telling me that Chloe wouldn't be allowed to see him because of the "condition" he was in. So they took her away to another room with a bunch of stranger while I was taken to the room where my husband laid... unconscious.

I remember seeing my dear, sweet husband lying on that bed surrounded by all those wires and monitors. Definitely the scariest singe moment in my entire life. As I stroked his hair I remember CRYING out to God to spare his life. I wept as the unbearable images ran through my head. Images of life without him. Images of life as a single parent. Images of never seeing him laugh again, joke again or see his daughter be married. It's amazing the things that run through your head during a devastatingly painful experience.

After sitting with him a while nurses encouraged me to get some sleep. After all, I had a daughter who still needed me and I was in the middle of a gigantic city I knew nothing about.

They explained to me that he would be in that "condition" for a little while longer. His body had just underwent a tremendous amount of shock and they reassured me that they would be monitoring his every second of recovery.

That night, back at the hotel, was the longest night of my life. As I laid there holding my young child the sobs would not cease. On my knees I pleaded for one more chance to see my husband. I begged God for a miracle. Through my tears, I prayed and I prayed and I prayed and I prayed.

Like I've never prayed before.

For anything.

And every hour I called that hospital. Praying for good news.

And every hour I received the same response, "No Mrs. Bender, your husband has not woken up yet."

"PLEASE God" I begged, "PLEASE let me talk to him - one last time." "PLEASE God, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE."

And finally... one last phone call was made to the hospital.

This time... with the best news these ears could have heard.

"Oh, Mrs. Bender, your husband is awake and asking for his girls!"

DEAR GOD! THANK YOU!!!!! THANK YOU! THANK YOU! THANK YOU!

I could barely get my hands to work to get my cloths on and get out that door of the hotel and into that rental car to take us to the hospital to SEE MY HUSBAND!

Praises to God filled that car. From both Chloe and I.

PRAISE God for this miracle of life.

PRAISE God for His grace and mercy.

PRAISE God for His provision.

THANK YOU! THANK YOU! THANK YOU!

I can never describe to you the joy that filled our lives that morning as we celebrated ONE more day with the man God designed for me to love. The overwhelming thankfulness we had far surpassed anything I'd ever felt before.

I believe God allows situations to happen in our lives that cause us to CLING to Him with FULL dependence which will in turn cause us to give THANKS to Him and PRAISE Him with everything we have!

This THANKSgiving I am thankful for SO many things.

I have been richly blessed.

I am THANKful for the miracle of LIFE.

May I NEVER take for granted another moment.

Every breath comes from Him and to Him I say... THANK YOU!

God is Good

I was talking with a close friend of mine the other day and she was telling me about a conversation she had recently with someone that had left her feeling... disheartened. Her words to me were "The more I get to know some people, the more disappointed I become."

Wow... isn't that true?

I could really sympathize with her. After all, people are disappointing. People make mistakes. We see it all the time...

People lie.
People cheat.
People argue.
People are back-stabbing.
People gossip.

Furthermore,

We are self-seeking.
We are envious.
We delight in drama.
We harshly judge others.
We brag.
We are jealous.
We are self-righteous.

We just are. We are human. We make mistakes and some times, more times than we'd care to admit it, make the SAME ones over and over again.

I have learned a lot about people over the years and the bottom line is - they will disappoint you almost every time.

Now - I am NOT saying there aren't good people out there with good motives. I believe we all have a deep-seeded desire to please others. To help others. To encourage and motivate others. We all want to be loved, appreciated, trusted and respected, and I truly believe we all long to build those kinds of honest relationships where all of those traits are present.

However, sooner or later, humans WILL ultimately disappoint each other. In one way or another.

Mark 10 tells a story of a rich man falling at Jesus' feet begging Him to tell him how he inherits eternal life. He begins his request with, "Good teacher". Jesus replies to him with this profound question/statement, "Why do you call me good? No one is good but God alone."

No one.

Jesus healed the sick, made the blind see, raised the dead to life and still considered himself unworthy to be called good.

God is good. He is who we need to place our trust in. He is the only one who won't fail us. Won't deny us. Won't betray us. He is the one in whom we should desire acceptance from because He is the one who loves us beyond comprehension.

People will fail us. They will hurt us. There's no doubt about it. But we have to let them off the hook too. They aren't God - and remember - we just learned that God is the ONLY one who is good.

As Christians, I believe we are called to live in the world but not be of the world. And living for the approval of man or expecting too much from men and women who are mere mortals is living as part of the world.

I believe that true living is when we place our hope, trust and love in the God of the universe... the One who loved us before we ever chose to love Him. Seeking His approval and His acceptance is the only goal I have here on this planet and I pray that I will live a life that is honoring to Him by expressing grace and mercy to those who... well... don't measure up. Lord knows I have failed MANY in my pursuit of perfectionism.

Letting people off the hook for failing to be perfect frees me up to focus more on living like Christ. Loving like Christ. Giving like Christ. And that's what matters most... to me.

God... use me to make the changes necessary in my life to reflect your love to a hurting world.

Recipe Friday

Happy Friday!

Made this recipe for our small group on Sunday night and it was a winner. I will note this: I added about one more cup of cheese than it called for AND I added cooked, crumbled bacon to the top before going into the oven. YUMMY! :)

Hope you enjoy!


Baked Macaroni and Cheese

Ingredients

* 1/2 pound elbow macaroni
* 3 tablespoons butter
* 3 tablespoons flour
* 1 tablespoon powdered mustard
* 3 cups milk
* 1/2 cup yellow onion, finely diced
* 1 bay leaf
* 1/2 teaspoon paprika
* 1 large egg
* 12 ounces sharp cheddar, shredded
* 1 teaspoon kosher salt
* Fresh black pepper

Topping:

* 3 tablespoons butter
* 1 cup panko bread crumbs

Directions

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F.

In a large pot of boiling, salted water cook the pasta to al dente.

While the pasta is cooking, in a separate pot, melt the butter. Whisk in the flour and mustard and keep it moving for about five minutes. Make sure it's free of lumps. Stir in the milk, onion, bay leaf, and paprika. Simmer for ten minutes and remove the bay leaf.

Temper in the egg. Stir in 3/4 of the cheese. Season with salt and pepper. Fold the macaroni into the mix and pour into a 2-quart casserole dish. Top with remaining cheese.

Melt the butter in a saute pan and toss the bread crumbs to coat. Top the macaroni with the bread crumbs. Bake for 30 minutes. Remove from oven and rest for five minutes before serving.

Doing Instead of Saying

Something has been on my mind lately and I'd like to share with you today...

How many times have we heard people say things like this to others going through a difficult season in their lives...

"If you need anything - let me know."

or

"Call me if you need anything."

Sincere people wanting to help. Wanting to do something to aide another one through their time of grief, suffering and pain.

I believe the motives are right. We want to help, don't we? We want to know that others can depend on us if they should need help in an area we can provide for them. And let's face it - we're pretty good at it. We help in all kinds of situations by doing all sorts of good things. We make meals, we provide child care, we give money, we pray for them. But sometimes, too often, we watch at a distance and wait for them to ask us for the help that they need.

I am in no way suggesting that we don't have sincere motives behind offering our help to others. I think most of us desire to actually be taken up on our offer to help. But - what happens when they don't ask.

All too often I've been a witness to people needing help but not knowing how to ask for it. No matter what kind of situation it is - some people just won't ask for help period. Perhaps it's pride. Maybe it's guilt. Just maybe they are too deep in their suffering that they can't possibly think of anything someone else can do that will ease even a bit of their pain. And although we may know something about what their going through - we don't know. This is THEIR journey, no ours.

A year ago a guest speaker named Tim Butler spoke at our church. Tim is a wonderful man, husband, father and counselor, who lost his daughter when she was just a young pre-teen to a terrible illness. Tim knows a little something about grief and suffering, and the desire to be comforted and supported during those days surrounding her death.

Tim suggests 4 guidelines for comforting those in grief:

1.) Make sure you have the right relationship for comforting close up and personal.
2.) Make plans to show personal support; include others if they are like-minded.
3.) Be prepared to find them in bad shape; be mentally prepared to allow them to be real.
4.) Sit with them and be silent; let them break for silence; do not let your anxiety control the conversation.

Tim went on to tell a story that I don't think I will forget. It was a story of practical support during the most devastating time of his life. A neighbor, knowing a little bit about what he was going through, made a decision to NOT ask Tim what he could do for him - but instead, decided to help in one of the most practical ways possible. In a visit with Tim late one evening just a day or so before the funeral, this neighbor told Tim that he had arranged to have a dumpster arrive at his home the following day. He explained to Tim that he knew he'd be needing it with all the visitors they'd be having at the house for the meal following the funeral. He went on to explain, "This is going to be very helpful for you and one less thing you have to worry about. Once it's filled, I'll just arrange to have it picked up."

Wow. This neighbor indeed knew how to be supportive and understood well that Tim would have never thought of this necessary item on his own as he was too knee-deep in his own suffering to even think about it. Or care. Thanks to this neighbor, the dumpster was the perfect way to support and comfort in time of need.

Tim suggests a number of things we should NOT do or say to someone grieving which includes things like:

"If you need anything call me." {They won't}
"I know how you feel." {You can't - this is their journey and everyone's pain is different}
"They are in a better place now." {They may know this to be true, but it doesn't help us when all we want is that person to be back with us}

and don't:
ask, "How are you doing?" {If you are not prepared to share their sorrow}
think you can fix them.
talk if you can't handle silence.

He goes on to provide us with a list of things TO do:

Listen.
Be present.
Laugh with them; weep with them.
Bring up the deceased by name.
Share any relevant stories that you had of their loved one.
Do something they will need/want - without asking.
Stay with them.

Tim goes on to say that perhaps it's just sitting... in the dark with them. And being still. And quiet. He says, "Sit in the dark space with someone you care about until your eyes adjust to the darkness and you can see what they see... that's what a helper is."

This is a real challenge for me. I am CLASSIC at offering my help by saying those words, "Let me know if you need anything." But I PRAY that God will make me into the type of person who gives without being asked. Who serves because Jesus came to serve. Who supports and comforts in tangible, practical ways that demonstrates genuine love for others. May I be used by God to DO instead of SAY I'm going to.

Recipe Friday

I made these about a month ago for my family. Used shredded chicken... and they were YUMMY!

Hope you enjoy!

SHREDDED BEEF OR CHICKEN ENCHILADAS

Ingredients:

* 1 tablespoon butter or margarine
* 2 medium onions, chopped
* 1 garlic clove, minced
* 2 tablespoons all-purpose flour
* 1 cup chicken broth
* 1 cup milk
* 2 (4 ounce) cans chopped green chilies
* 1/4 teaspoon salt
* 1/4 teaspoon ground cumin
* 8-9 flour or corn tortillas
* 2 1/2 cups cooked, shredded beefchuck roast or shredded chicken
* 1 1/2 cups shredded Monterey Jack cheese
* 1 1/2 cups shredded Cheddar cheese
* 2 green onions with tops, thinly sliced (optional)
* Sour cream
* Salsa

Directions:

1. Prepare your meat however you would like. I baked three chicken breasts, with a small amount of enchilada sauce, in the oven for about an hour on 400 degrees F. Remove from oven, shred into a bowl and set aside. (You can be creative here, use whatever meat you want and cook it how you like).
2. In a saucepan, melt butter over medium heat. Saute onion and garlic until onion is tender. Mix the flour in the broth, stir into pan. Stir in milk, chilies, salt and cumin. Cook and stir until thickened and bubbly. Reduce heat; simmer 5 minutes, stirring occasionally. Set aside.
3. Grease a 13 x 9 inch baking dish. Spoon a little sauce in the center of each tortilla; spread to the edges. Place meat down the center of each tortilla. Combine cheeses; sprinkle on top of meat. Roll up tortillas and place in baking dish, seam-side down.
4. Pour remaining sauce and some enchilada sauce over tortillas, if you like a wet enchilada use more sauce. Sprinkle with green onions and remaining cheese. Bake, uncovered, at 350 degrees F for 20-30 minutes or until hot and bubbly. Serve with sour cream and salsa.

Listening for God

Do any of you have trouble being still and quiet? I mean - really still. And really quiet.

I do.

I have always been an on-the-go person. Always going. Always moving. Always somewhere to go, someone to call, something to write, a book to read, a meal to make, a snotty nose to wipe, laundry to fold or dishes to do. I even have a hard time sitting in front of the television even if I'm purely exhausted to just sit. And listen.

My sweet husband has the amazing ability to come home and shut down. I don't mean shut down from his family - that's not it at all - but I do mean that once he comes through the door at the end of a hard days work, he can easily decompress and just "be".

I'm not so lucky. My mind's always wandering. Planning. Thinking. If this tells you anything about the way my brain works - I have a notebook in my living room, one in my bedroom, one in my bathroom and SEVERAL in my kitchen - which, by the way, tends to be the place we "hang out in" the most. These "notebooks" are for me to write down the thoughts that are in my head. It may be an errand that I need to make, a birthday card I need to send, a name of a friend who I need to call, email or pray for or even just a random thought that pops in my head for no apparent reason at all!

It's no wonder then that when God tries to get my attention about something... I'm often times "unavailable" to hear His call.

I confessed to someone recently that I struggle (a lot) with the idea of discernment. I'll admit that I'm often envious of people who express their abilities to "hear God". I've heard great women and men of God say things like, "I heard God tell me to ______" or "God has called me to _______". I cheer for them and celebrate with them - but for a number of years have not been able to relate to them.

Until recently.

You see - I decided that if I'm going to hear God, and I don't mean audibly hear Him, although I know He can and does speak this way to many people, if I'm going to really hear Him - then I have to be ready to listen for Him.

I believe God speaks to us through many different ways... through praying, through reading His word are just a couple - but I believe God speaks to us most clearly when we come to Him, prepared to listen and when we are still and quiet. There is so much distraction in our every day lives. So much noise. So many things that are pulling is in one direction or another. But when we decide to carve time out of our days to actively LISTEN to the God that created the universe and allow all other distractions to fade away and be STILL and QUIET... we're going to hear from Him.

I've learned recently that in order for me to FULLY hear what God is trying to communicate to me... I MUST give Him my full attention. So... these are the steps I've taken to prepare myself to hear:

1.) Create a Time
I've carved out a specific time in my day EVERY day to become a listener to what God is saying. To me this means the SAME time every day. A time when I know I will be undisturbed or distracted.

2.) Create a Space
I've dedicated a special place in my home which, for me, creates the ideal environment for receiving a word from God.

3.) Shut off the World Around Me
This is the most important. I turn off all distractions there could possibly be. My cell phone, the T.V., music, the dryer, dishwasher etc. I believe this says to God, "I am ready. I am yours. Let's talk."

I believe God desperately wants to have a conversation with us, but that doesn't mean that we do all the talking. He has things He wants to tell us... we just have to be ready and willing to listen. Really listen. Are you ready to listen? I am!

Loving Difficult People

Beth Moore has SUCH a creative way of getting to the HEART of matters that are so painful and difficult to deal with. Anyone who has ever heard her speak, listened to her podcasts, read one of her books, or taken one of her bible studies, know this to be absolute truth. She is an amazing woman of God who has been blessed with an incredible ability to minister to women.

A few weeks back I ran across one of Beth's videos posted on youtube and it hit me to the CORE. It's entitled "Loving Difficult People". I don't know if I'm the ONLY one out there who's ever dealt with this kind of thing before - but I knew the moment I found it that God was trying to speak to me.

This world is filled with difficult, unlovely people. People who hurt us with their words, people who drive us crazy by their negativity, and people who have left us drained and empty from their bitterness. It never fails... just when I think I've discovered freedom from the scars they've left, another attack comes... sometimes harsher than the one before it.

My prayer is that someone else out there besides me has been in this same situation before and will be blessed by Beth's teaching on Loving Difficult People. Below are some of the key points of her video sessions including scriptures. I have also attached the link to these video sessions below - please note there are 6 total sessions each approximately 8 minutes in length. If you've struggled in this area, I pray that you will take some time this week to listen to these sessions. Let's learn together about what God has to say about how to deal with these difficult people...

Loving Difficult People - Beth Moore {Life Today}

Do you have that kind of person who has such a negative and critical spirit that leaves you so frustrated and so empty that when you leave you just have to go each some Mexican food?

The people who drive you crazy the most are the people we are challenged to be around often or it wouldn't drive us so crazy!

Who is your THORNY?

The most effective things we could do to become healthy people in Christ is to let people off the hook for failing to be God. They will fail us over and over and over again but they'll never fail us as often if we just let them be man... only God can love like God.

God IS love - it's party of WHAT He is - it's IN His DNA. To have God not love us one day in our minds is to say "God isn't God today"... because love is what God is!

We need to say to ourselves... I love ________ because God first loved me. (1 John 4:19)

I can be so certain of God's love that I am freed up to love who does not love me back because I've already been loved back by God.

You've got to know your significant before you ever even walk out the door!

We can love people who can give us back nothing because God gives us everything.

God never calls us to love blind... biblical love is love with a smart heart.

Sometimes the people who hurt us the most had no idea how much that was gonna hurt.

1.) Know and rely on the love God has for us. (1 John 4:7-21)

2.) Learn to love with God's love. (Romans 5:5)

3.) Learn to love with insight. (Phil 1:9-11)

Ask God to tell you what's happened to them and give you compassion for what they are going through.

Let God deal with our stuff!

Is there a possibility that the person who nearly kills us to love is used by God to kill something in us to love? (It turns up the heat to reveal all our sin in us and skim it off of us!)

We will never look more like our Father in Heaven, then we love the unlovely!

We need to learn to love WELL!

1 John 4:20 "If anyone says, 'I love God' yet hates his brother, is a liar. For anyone who does not love his brother whom He has seen, cannot love God whom he has not seen."

Monday Moments with God

So... I am starting something new on my blog. It's called Monday Moments with God.

I have been abundantly blessed with such wonderful people in my life who have prayed for me. I mean, diligently prayed for me. I have felt these prayers through some of the darkest hours of my life... and I have appreciated their petitions to God on my behalf more than I can ever say.

So... I'm choosing to give back.

I've chosen to designate Monday as the day that I will pray for YOU! I find it an honor and a privilege to be able to serve this way and will pray for any and all requests that I receive.

Now - this doesn't mean that the only day I'm going to pray for others will be on Monday... please know that I am in prayer DAILY... however, I want to provide a way for my friends and followers, to be able to share their hearts with me. You may submit a prayer request by one of the following ways:

Comment on my facebook page

Comment here on my blog

Email me (wbender73@yahoo.com)

Thank you for allowing me to partner with God on your behalf. Again, I consider it an honor and privilege to PRAY for you.

I look forward to hearing from you!

Recipe Friday

Oops - haven't had any time to blog this week - but wanted to throw in my Friday recipe. I made this one this summer. It was very yummy! It's a Neely's recipe from TV Food Network.

Hope you get to make it - - enjoy!

Zucchini Gratin

Ingredients

* 2 tablespoons butter
* 1 medium onion, chopped
* 3 cloves garlic, chopped
* 6 zucchini, sliced into half moons 1/4-inch thick
* 2 plum tomatoes, chopped and seeded
* 1 tablespoon freshly chopped thyme leaves
* 2 tablespoons all-purpose flour
* Salt and freshly ground black pepper
* 1 tablespoon brown sugar
* 2 eggs, beaten
* 1/2 cup half-and-half
* 1/4 cup grated sharp white Cheddar
* 1/4 cup grated Parmesan

Directions

Preheat your oven to 375 degrees F. Butter an 8 by 8-inch casserole dish.

In a large heavy bottomed saute pan over medium heat, melt butter. Saute onion and garlic until translucent. Add zucchini and tomatoes, about 7 minutes Add thyme, and flour. Season with salt and pepper. Add mixture to the buttered casserole dish.

In a medium size bowl, add brown sugar, eggs, and half-and-half. Season with salt and pepper. Pour the milk mixture over the zucchini and sprinkle with both of the cheeses. Bake for 30 minutes.

Treasure Hunt 2010

So - I decided to do a Halloween Party again for Chloe this year. I'm just as excited as she is about it - if not a little more. I am CHERISHING these days with her as I know there will come a time (ALL TOO SOON) when she won't want anything to do with Halloween parties. :(

This year I decided to do a Treasure Hunt for the six girls who will be with us this evening. I had TOO much fun making this little rhyming game up and so I wanted to share it with you. I've included the anwers for all of you to see... shhh!! :)

I will post pictures tomorrow!

CLUE # 1 (Chloe reads)
Happy Halloween all you witches and warlocks
here is your first clue...
He scares you as you enter into the long driveway
that's where you will find clue # 2
(blog friends - this is our scarecrow in our driveway)

CLUE # 2 (Hannah Blakely reads)
So you found clue # 2 and that was GOOD
but you have so much to see...
hope the tree ghosts don't scare you
as you search for # 3
(blog friends - this is the paper ghosts we have tied up in our tree)

CLUE # 3 (Victoria reads)
You are doing well and on your way
closer than you were before
be careful not to cross the bridge
as you look for # 4
(blog friends - this is the bridge we have over our pond)

CLUE # 4 (Maya reads)
Do you like to dance and groove?
Do you like to jive?
Check out where there's music
and you'll discover # 5
(blog friends - this is a boombox I'll have with music playing)

CLUE # 5 (Hannah Bartenslager reads)
On summer days it's nice for dad
to swing out in the sticks
but don't sit around too long
as you're finding # 6
(blog friends - this is Trevor's hammock he got this year for Father's Day)

CLUE # 6 (Samantha reads)
There is a sky so blue
when you look to towards heaven
but something else is up there managing the wind
could it be clue # 7?
(blog friends - this is our windmill we have by our pond)

CLUE # 7 (Chloe reads)
“Be careful” is what my mom says.
You'd better have a mate...
because it's lots more fun that way
as you jump to # 8
(blog friends - this is Chloe's trampoline)

CLUE # 8 (Hannah Blakely reads)
You are getting very close
but the treasure will be mine
if you can't locate in the cornstalks
for the next clue # 9
(blog friends - this is the decorative stalks I have on our front porch)

CLUE # 9 (Victoria reads)
AHA! There's only one clue left
Find it if you can!
Don't burn yourself in the fire
as you arrive at # 10!
(blog friends - this is the bonfire pit)

Recipe Friday

When I was blogging before, I did a RECIPE FRIDAY, and had so much fun with it - I decided to continue it. I am hoping some might find these recipes helpful. I will only post those in which my family and I have tried and found tasty ourselves. :)

I tried this one this summer... and it's not a very "warm-weather" dish, but would certainly be good as a fall/winter meal for a larger family. It's delicious and filling! (And if you're anything like me - you'll appreciate the one-dish meals!) Don't be discouraged by the long list of ingredients - they can all be prepped ahead of time and placed in small baggies until you're ready to cook! Note: I didn't include the jalapeno pepper when I made it.

ENJOY!


Shrimp and Sausage Jambalaya

Ingredients

* 1 tablespoon olive oil
* 1 pound sausage, such as kielbasa or andouille, sliced
* 1 pound smoked ham, cubed
* 1 tablespoon butter
* 1 medium onion, diced
* 1 cup diced celery
* 1 green bell pepper, cored and diced
* 1 red bell pepper, cored and diced
* 1 cup seeded and diced tomato
* 3 garlic cloves, minced
* 1 jalapeno pepper, seeded and minced OR 1/2 teaspoon cayenne
* 2 teaspoons diced fresh oregano
* 1 teaspoon diced fresh thyme
* 2 tablespoons tomato paste
* 6 cups chicken stock, preferably homemade
* 3 cups long-grain rice, rinsed
* 3 bay leaves
* 2 teaspoons kosher salt
* 1 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper
* 6 to 8 dashes hot sauce, optional (recommended: Tabasco)
* 1/2 cup chopped scallions, divided
* 3/4 cup chopped fresh parsley, divided
* 1/4 cup freshly squeezed lemon juice
* 1 pound medium shrimp, deveined (20 to 24 count)

Directions

Heat the oil in a large Dutch oven or black iron pot over medium heat, add the kielbasa and saute for 8 to 10 minutes, until browned. Remove the kielbasa to a bowl, and set aside. Add the ham to the same pot and cook 8 to 10 minutes, until lightly browned. Remove to the bowl with the kielbasa, and set aside. Add the butter, onion, celery and peppers to the same pot and saute for 8 to 10 minutes, until the onion is translucent. Add the tomato, garlic, jalapeno or cayenne, oregano, thyme, and tomato paste and cook until all the vegetables and herbs are blended well. Add the stock and bring to a rolling boil. Stir in the rice, and add the sausage, ham, bay leaves, salt, pepper and hot sauce. Return to a boil, reduce the heat to low and simmer, covered, for 20 minutes. Add 1/4 cup of the scallions, 1/4 cup of the parsley, the lemon juice and the shrimp, and stir well. Cover the pot, remove it from the heat and allow the jambalaya steam, for 15 minutes, before serving.

Garnish with the remaining 1/4 cup scallions and 1/2 cup parsley, and a dash of hot sauce, if desired.

The Hairspray

I ran out of hairspray yesterday. It's never a good day when this happens. At first I thought - WHAT am I going to do? But had I really paid attention to the weather outside and the almost SIXTY-miles-an-hour winds, I would have passed on even the ATTEMPT to do my hair.

After realizing that my current bottle was completely out, I began to panic a little bit. Superficial, I know, but my hair requires hairspray to look half way decent when I leave the house.

In a panic, I began searching the bathroom cupboards for perhaps an old bottle remaining somewhere. Anywhere. One was not to be found. UNTIL I reached my hand to the VERY back shelf and found a VERY OLD and DUSTY bottle of spray. Alas.. an answer to prayer! (Well - okay, I wasn't actually PRAYING I'd find a bottle of hairspray - but it did save me for a time.) :) It still worked and did the trick. I was grateful.

But then it got me thinking...

I wonder if that's how God feels sometimes. I mean... don't we tend to "put him on a shelf", tucked away neatly behind all the other junk in our cupboards, only pulling him out when we desperately NEED Him? We try it on our own... perhaps we try other things to help me, give us answers, make us feel better - only to discover that we really can't to it without Him.

I've been completely guilty of this! There have times in my life when I've felt myself saying, "God, I've got this, why don't you go ahead and sit this one out." And so - I put Him on that shelf... way in the back... and try to do life my own way. But here's the thing... it never works! I always find myself in that desperate place of needing Him.

Perhaps it's a crisis going on in your life... a cancer that was just discovered, an accident led to tragedy, a broken heart, a wounded spirit, an intolerable child, an angry spouse, an opportunity missed, a friendship broken, a marriage crushed. I believe God's waiting for us to discover our EVERY DAY dependency on Him. I believe God's saying, "I GOT THIS... you can go ahead and sit this one out!"

We were NOT meant to do this thing called life alone! He's just a prayer away and longing for us to reach out for Him. Will we continue to put him on the shelf, in the back of the cupboard or will we allow Him to work in our lives every day?

He's got this, friend, He's got this!

I Am A Mom

I waited my WHOLE life to be a mom. Really. I did. I remember playing as a child with my baby dolls and having a longing to mother another human being. I guess God blessed me with that innate desire for nurturing.

I remember when Chloe was first born. I couldn't stop looking at her. I stared for hours into that tiny face, studying her every feature. The way her nose twitched, the way her mouth drooped when she giggled and those eyes... those beautiful eyes that could melt your heart!

I remember praying for her. I prayed that God would protect her. I prayed that she would have a heart for pleasing Jesus and she would grow up tall and strong, kind, caring and smart. I prayed over and over again that she would make wise decisions and live a life filled with joy and peace.

I still pray every day for this precious daughter of mine! She is a gift from God. Now my prayers include thanksgiving. Chloe loves Jesus and lives her life to serve Him and others. She is strong, kind, caring and smart! With Gods help, she is making wise decisions that make her daddy and I very proud.

I am a mom. God, help me to be the best mom I can be!

I'm Out of Blog Retirement!

Well... it's been almost 21 months since my last post!! WOWZERS! Where DOES the time go? Lots has changed for me within those months. I should have lots to say - and I DO... but I will need to learn how to refrain to one post per day. :)

This... is my journey. This is a glimpse into my daily living. Glad you've stopped by to join me on this ride! I hope you will stop by often.

Because of His Grace,

Dreaming

On December 21, Pastor Scott, of my home church, Crossroads Community Church, did a great message on Dreaming. It was part of a message series entitled.. 'Tis the Season. This message... 'Tis the Season for Dreaming.

I have to say, it was one of the best messages I've had the privilege to hear him give over the past 5 years of attending Crossroads.

I pulled out the message CD the other day and got to listening to it again. Here's some of my favorite key points from that powerful message:

"I believe God is sick and tired of Christians asking God to give us breadcrumbs, when He's capable of giving us a feast!"

"God doesn't need our recommendations... He wants our recognition."

"God didn't die on a cross so we can survive, He died on a cross so we could thrive!"

"God is able to do immeasurably more than we could ever ask for or imagine."

"We're certainly not a perfect church because we've got people in it!"

"Can you imagine a church that is more concerned about people than it is about the color of the carpet? That's it's more concerned that when people walk in that we want people to come as they are... that we don't care what color you are, what economic level you come from, what side of the tracks you come from... that we're more concerned that we love you, that we appreciate you, that you're welcome because God is passionate about people!"

"Can you imagine a church that reaches out into the community and stops playing political games and doing protests and doing boycotts that Jesus couldn't give a rip about? I can!"

"I've got news for you and I've got news for the critics and skeptics and naysayers about Crossroads or about any other church that goes through growth... We're not gonna back up, we're not gonna let up, we're not gonna shut up until we are called up. We're not gonna give up because we serve a God who is able to do immeasurably more than we can ask for or imagine and I don't know about you, but I'm ready to get on with it!"

"What would you be willing to do for God and His Kingdom if you knew you couldn't fail?"

"God wants you to get over your but."

"If we're going to reach people that no one else is reaching, I believe we've got to be willing to do things that no one else is doing."

I'm proud to belong to a church that dreams like this.

Are you dreaming like this?

More on Lasting Impressions

I mentioned in my last post that I'm reading a terrific book entitled, Lasting Impressions by Mark Waltz. Here's some more highlights... some things I'm chewing on...

Mark teaches the difference between feeling responsible FOR people he leads verses being responsible TO the people he leads.

"THE FREEDOM OF RESPONSIBILITY TO:

When I'm responsible to people, I understand they have choices.
When I'm responsible for people, I think I should decide for them.
When I'm responsible to people, I know they must figure out their next steps.
When I'm responsible for people, I try to tell them what their next steps are.
When I'm responsible to people, I know they must bear the consequences of their own chosen actions.
When I'm responsible for people, I assume the guilt - or worse, the shame - for them.
When I'm responsible to people, I share their journeys, offering encouragement and teaching.
When I'm responsible for people, I try to direct their journeys, never allowing them to wrestle, mess up, or make a wrong turn.
When I'm responsible to people, I talk to God a lot on their behalf.
When I'm responsible for people, I talk to people a lot on God's behalf."

New Book!

I love a new book! This one I actually pre-ordered about 2 months ago and I just got it a couple weeks ago. I was so excited. This is book #2 by Mark Waltz, Connections Pastor for Granger Community Church in Indiana. This one is a must read first... but I'm discovering a new love for this new one. Here's something I've been pondering...

"People want to belong to something bigger than they are, something exciting, adventurous, something excellent and significant. But if we aren't clear about calling people to be disciples, sold-out followers of Jesus Christ, they will continue to show up, cheer and maybe even tell their friends, but their lives may not reflect a personal, missional buy-in to the agenda of the kingdom of God and the grace of Jesus Christ. People matter too much to miss this critical distinction. God's agenda matters too much to allow this confusion."

Prayer Needed

I ran across this link through a blog I follow a couple days ago and I have felt burdened to pray for this family.





Mark Lamberth was in a dirt bike accident on Saturday afternoon, December 13. It appears that the damage to Mark’s brain is severe and irreversible, but his family and friends are praying for a miracle.

You can read more about his condition through the blog that was created for him here.

Will you join me in prayer for this family? I don't know them, but God certainly does and they need as many prayers as we're willing to give.

Christmas Traditions

I LOVE Christmas! And with that - I LOVE Christmas traditions! I love the oldies that we've been doing year after year and I love the new ones we make with our family each year.

Here are some of our family's Christmas traditions...

1.) Family Christmas Cookie Day. When I was a kid my grandma, my aunt, my cousins, my mom and myself used to get together for a cookie bake off always the week before Christmas! It was a BLAST! I just remember my grandma's tiny kitchen being jam-packed with flour, eggs, baking soda, peanut butter, chocolate chips and sugar covered over everything that would stand still! It was such a great time and some of my sweetest memories are of us in that kitchen!

2.) Birthday Cake for Jesus. This is something that Chloe has really enjoyed the last couple years. She especially enjoys the decorative touches!

3.) Christmas Prayer Links. This is something we started a couple years ago. We take green and red construction paper and make a prayer link (you know the links you used to make as a kid?). We put the name of someone we want to pray for on each link and then take the days leading up to Christmas to pray for each and every individual name on the links. It's a neat way to keep the focus away from ourselves and on other people we love and care about.

4.) Snowflakes. We make home-made snowflakes and hang them up from our kitchen ceiling. Chloe's gotten into the habit of then naming all of her snowflakes. :)

5.) Christmas picture. We've done this every year since Chloe's been born. We take her picture (or of all three of us if it works out) next to our decorated Christmas tree to send in our Christmas cards to our friends and family. Then we frame the picture and put them out on display during the Christmas holiday.

6.) Christmas Tree decorating night. Every year our Christmas tree goes up the day after Thanksgiving. No exceptions. As we decorate the tree, we ALWAYS watch Christmas Vacation. It's just what we watch! ALWAYS!

7.) Mama's House Sleepover. For years we used to stay the night at my mother-in-law's the night before Christmas Eve. We did this from the time Chloe was born (the year my father-in-law passed away) until about 2 years ago. Hey mom - we need to continue that tradition... we're coming over this year! :)

8.) Sleigh Ride. Every Christmas Eve since I was a KID, we've gone out to look at Christmas lights around town. In recent years, we've added a twist to this old time favorite... we bundle up in coats, hats, scarfs and gloves, pack a thermos of hot cocoa, get in the car and drive around looking at lights WITH THE WINDOWS ROLLED DOWN! This is particularly fun when it's snowing... kind of feels like you're strolling in a carriage ride through the snow!

9.) Thank You Letters. Every year I sit down days before Christmas and write individual letters to my family members. My daughter, my husband and my parents. I thank them for being in my life and tell them what they mean to me. I highlight memories I have with them over that year and just simply take the time to tell them how much I love them. Then I hide them in the tree for them to find on Christmas morning.

Those are some of our family's Christmas traditions... what are some of yours???

Proud Mommy Moment # 1,009 :)

So... my daughter decided today that she'd like to go see Santa at the Adrian Mall. This is a far cry from last year when she would barely walk past the man without "feeling embarrassed."

She marched right up to Santa's station and before I knew it, she was on his knee. Have I ever mentioned how cute she is?

He started out with the same question he asks all the kids... "Have you been naughty or nice?"

Then he asked what she wanted this year for Christmas.

I think some of her answers surprised him.

First she started out with all the normal things she's been asking for for some time now... a guitar, pix-o's, HSM3 stuff etc, etc.

But these last 2 requests made Santa a bit speechless.

"I'd like a hardcover Bible." (He mentioned that for him, this was a first.)
"I'd like some soup for the poor people."

I love how compassionate Chloe is.
I love her heart and how she's always thinking of other people's needs before her own.
I believe that's how Christ intends for us to live.

I'm such a proud mommy.
I have the best little girl in the world!

I love you Chloe!

New Recipe

I realized that I hadn't posted a recipe in quite a long time. I found this one in a magazine a couple months back and I made them this past Thanksgiving. They were a big hit so I thought I'd share it here with all of you.

Candy Bar Cookies

Prep time: 35 minutes Bake time: 10 minutes Cool: 2 hours

1 cup packed brown sugar
2/3 cup butter
1/4 cup dark or light-color corn syrup (I used light b/c that's what I had)
1/4 cup peanut butter
1 teaspoon vanilla
3 1/2 cups quick-cooking rolled oats
1 12-ounce package semisweet chocolate chips (2 cups)
1 cup butterscotch chips
2/3 cup peanut butter
1 cup chopped nuts

Preheat oven to 375 degrees.

For oat layer, in medium saucepan, stir together brown sugar, butter and corn syrup over medium-low heat until combined. Remove saucepan from heat. Stir in the 1/4 cup peanut butter and vanilla until smooth.

Place the rolled oats in a very large bowl. Pour brown sugar mixture over oats, stirring gently until combined. Press oat mixture evenly onto bottom of an ungreased 13x9x2-inch baking pan.

Bake in preheated oven for 10-12 minutes or until edges are lightly browned. Let oat layer cool slightly in pan on wire rack.

In the same saucepan, stir together chocolate chips and butterscotch chips over low heat until melted. Stir in the 2/3 cups peanut butter until mixture is smooth.

Sprinkle half of the peanuts over oat layer in pan. Slowly pour chocolate mixture over the peanut-topped oat layer, spreading evenly. Sprinkle the remaining peanuts on top of chocolate.

Cool in pan on a wire rack for several hours or until chocolate layer is firm. Cut into 1-inch squares. Makes about 115 pieces.

To store: Cover and store in the refrigerator for up to 3 days or freeze up to 3 months.

YUM-O!

Charlene

I met Charlene Larson back in October of 2001 when she started Small Wonders Preschool and Daycare. I will never forget the first time I met her! That smile, that laughter... it was contagious! I knew I had found the right person to take care of my only child, Chloe.

I cannot begin to put into words the kind of person Charlene was and what she meant to our family. Words that come to mind that describe my friend include... joyful, caring, loving, trustworthy, funny, outrageous, courageous, thankful, gentle, spontaneous, wonderful, crazy... the list could go on and on. I loved so many things about Charlene. She changed my world. She made me want to be a better person. I feel privileged and honored to have been able to have her as part of my life for 7 years!

So - here's to you, my friend...

Thank you for living an authentic, transparent life.
Thank you for loving my child like she was one of your own.
Thank you for your hugs.
Thank you for the Small Wonders back rubs.
Thank you for living selflessly.
Thank you for teaching us about forgiveness.
Thank you for teaching us about finding the good in everything and everyone.
Thank you for your courage.
Thank you for your laughter.

Thank you... for you. I love you my dear friend and I will miss you every day this side of heaven. But I rest in the knowledge that we will be together again one day in paradise. Today... the angels have one more reason to celebrate and I can just hear the words of our Savior saying... "WELL DONE, my good and faithful servant."

You will live in our hearts forever!

Dance on, Charlene! Dance on!

I know it's gonna be worth it! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BQVmR0jV52A

Feeling Thankful...

This year I thought I'd jot a few of my thankful thoughts down as this Thanksgiving day quickly approaches.

I'm THANKful for...

My wonderful husband who makes my life complete!
My beautiful daughter for giving me a reason to want to be a better person!
My mom and dad who gave me life and who stand beside me no matter what!
The awesome work I get to do every day of my life!
My friends who know me well and STILL love me!
My dog who teaches me every day about loyalty!
The volunteers I have the privledge of serving alongside of each week who teach me what it means to truly give your life away!
CHOCOLATE! This one goes without saying, right?
My mother-in-law for living such a selfless life!
My great nieces and nephews and all the smooches I get from them!
SNOW! I LOVE SNOW!
Coca-Cola - the drink that's gotten me through many a mornings!
My health.
My trusty Trail Blazer. It's not the greatest, but it's reliable and always gets me where I'm going.
My small group. They pretty much ROCK!
Email! What would we do without email?!
God! For sending His son, Jesus Christ, to die on a cross for ME! For His grace, mercy and love!

What are YOU thankful for this year?

Happy Thanksgiving!!

She's 8...

Had an interesting conversation with Chloe tonight while cutting her nails...

Chloe: Don't cut that one too short, that's my special nail.

Me: Why, is that the one you use to pick your nose?

Chloe: NO! I use my middle one for that.

Ha! That kid cracks me up!

It's Coming...

... mark your calendars! December 5 & 6. More info coming Sunday at Crossroads!

Here's last years video (you'll want to put my play list on pause so you can hear the music with the video).

Paying It Forward... Pass it on!

So.. I'm normally not a breakfast eater, but this morning when I left the house I realized I needed to take some cold meds and the side of the bottle strongly advised that I eat something when taking the medicine. So - I decided to stop at Mickey D's for a breakfast of champions... an Egg McMuffin Meal.

When I got up to the window to pay the woman said to me, "No need to worry about paying - the gentleman ahead of you paid for your breakfast this morning!"

WHAT? Who does that?

She went on to explain that almost every day this particular person comes through the drive-thru and he "pays it forward" by paying for the car in back of him. She even said that there are days that it's a little more expensive than normal - but it's okay by him. She said he feels honored and humbled to be able to do for someone else.

Again - WHAT? Who does that?

Well - this man does! And I was quite inspired by that! I have to say - it made my day and it caused me to pause during the hustle and bustle of my day to thank God for this man and to thank Him for all of the blessings He has given to me in my life.

When I got to work this morning, I received a note from a friend. She, too, was "paying it forward" by forwarding me a note she'd received in the signature line of another friend of hers. It said:

"You have not lived a perfect day, even though you have earned your money, unless you have done something for someone who cannot repay you."

Priceless! A perfect ending to my blessed morning.

I'm going to pay it forward. I'm going to encourage my teams to pay it forward. Together - we can change lives by demonstrating Christ's love. Let's be His hands and feet. Start today.

Pay it forward... Pass it on!

Fall Time Fun!

Took the kids to the Clinton Fall Festival last week. We had a nice time. I think the kids had more fun. For the first hour or so that we were there - it was all about them. We ate - what they wanted, visited the booths - they wanted to visit and did things - they wanted to do. What's up with that? :)

One of the first booths we came across was face painting. This was NO ordinary face painting either, let me tell you! This woman was incredible! So - with their own money... they picked out and purchased their own face painting. Take a look...









Happy Fall!

Wherefore Art Thou Toothfairy?

I'm ashamed right now to even admit this.

I blogged earlier in the week about Chloe losing 2 teeth right?

So... She goes to bed on Tuesday night and decides that she should tape the envelope with her teeth in it to her bedpost so that 1.) It doesn't fall behind her bed and 2.) So to make SURE that the Tooth Fairy sees the tooth (after all she's very small, you know?!). I have a pretty smart kid. :)

Wednesday morning she wakes up. Envelope still there. Teeth still inside. No money.

Darn that Tooth Fairy must have forgotten all about it!

Wednesday night Chloe decides to tape it to the very top of her bunk bed ledge. This time "she's sure to see it" my daughter cries out!

Yep - for SURE she should have seen it.

She didn't.

She forgot.

Again.

So... we will try again tonight.

Must be the Tooth Fairy is getting old.

And forgetful!

;)

Losing Teeth!

There's an epidemic going around Chloe's third grade classroom! Everyone is losing teeth like mad! This week Chloe lost 2 teeth. Other kids in her class have also lost multiple teeth too! Good thing picture day was LAST week!

Here's my very own jack-o-lantern! :)

Complete Randomness

I haven't posted in a while. I know most of you will believe me when I say this... it's NOT because I haven't had anything to say. Just not enough time to say it! :)

So - here's some complete randomness...

~ School starts next week and my baby's gonna be in the THIRD grade! I can hardly believe she's that old already! Heck - I can hardly believe I'm that old already!

~ Trevor and I passed a sign hanging in a store today that said, "50% off everything today only!" Not very unusual. But the store was closed. Hmmm...?

~ I just saw a sign that said "Obama-Biden" and for a moment I could have sworn it said "Osama Binladin". What??

~ It's the end of summer and I realized the other day that not only did we NOT finish the projects we had planned... some of them we didn't even start! It's been a busy summer! Guess those summer projects will turn into fall projects... and so on. ;)

~ Went school shopping the other day. Was successful on clothes - but found absolutely NO shoes that were decent! Not ONE pair. Seriously. It was weird. It's slim pickens out there for shoes! Does anyone know where they actually have cute shoes for 8-year-olds?

~ Every morning this week - I've woke up at 4:20 A.M. and couldn't get back to sleep. Weird? Is God revealing 4:20 to me for some reason?

~ Went to lunch this week with two of the greatest people I know. I'm blessed to have such wonderful friendships!

~ I spent 2 hours on an online project this week that I accidentally deleted and LOST in it's entirety! ARGH! That's 2 hours I can't get back! :0

~ I'm addicted to party planning. I know, it's weird. I've already started planning Chloe's Fall Party in October.

~ Have you been grocery shopping lately? OMW! I was in Wal-Mart yesterday and was so disgusted at the rising prices of things! Things I noted that were SKY HIGH are... cheese, milk, produce, peanut butter, butter and bread. And that's just because those are the basics I needed. WOW! Dropped $140.32 like it was nothing!

That's it. That's all I got.

Hope to get back to posting more regularly soon.

;}

The Lead of Love

The other day I was sharing my story with someone who had some questions about the my life's journey. During the course of the conversation, I found myself, several times, saying, "looking back I see God's fingerprints all over my life!"

The person I was talking with was questioning this... asking, "What do you mean by 'God's fingerprints'?" And so I continued with story after story about the times God had me in just the right place at just the right moment and how His love has been so evident in this journey of mine.

I decided to post some of these "Fingerprints of God" in my life...

~ The time I was in a severe car accident that should have ended my life. I shaved the side of a tree with my car. An onlooker would later recall the incident as "amazing"... "like someone "lifted your car and moved it right out of the path that was leading directly into a tree!" No - that was God' fingerprints.

~ Blessing me with a wonderful man in which to share my life with. Someone who is not only my husband, but my best friend. Someone to laugh with, cry with and love. God's fingerprints.

~ The love and support I received from friends and family following the death of my best friend my freshmen year of college and the lessons learned about God's grace and mercy even in times of great sorrow. God's fingerprints.

~ For God's perfect timing on the conception and birth of my daughter, Chloe. I waited and waited to have her - begging God for a baby in my timing. I learned that only His time is the perfect time. God's fingerprints.

~ For giving me special friends and mentors who aren't afraid to speak truth into my life - even when it hurts - because they care about me that much. God's fingerprints.

~ For a sprained ankle back in 2005 that kept me down and out for close to 3 weeks because God needed to get my attention and tell me to slow down! I slowed down and was able to really hear God during that time. God's fingerprints.

I could go on and on about the times in which God was leading in my life. Times that I can look back on and see Him at work and it's absolutely amazing!

I love the song by Caedmon's Call entitled, "Lead of Love".... Enjoy it!

A man is more than the sum of his deeds! Thank you, God, for your lead of love!

My Daughter Cracks Me Up!

So - - Chloe sat in the service with us yesterday. (She does that far more than I like to admit!) And she's become a pretty good note-taker. She pays attention and even though I know she doesn't always "get it" she always seems to take something away from the service she attends.

I'm afraid this is not so true for yesterday.

Pastor Scott's message yesterday was entitled Shadows. He talked about the valleys we go through in life and how even in the midst of those valleys we should fear no evil, because as Christ-followers, we can rest in the knowledge that God is always with us. He said that all dark valleys are inevitable... we're either just coming out of a really dark valley, we're currently in a dark valley or we're getting ready to go into a dark valley. Either way - valleys of the shadow of death are unpredictable, impartial, temporary and purposeful.

Pretty good stuff.

As I look down at the fill-in's on my eight-year-olds paper, here is what I see...

Valleys are COOL
Valleys are WIRD (supposed to be WEIRD)
Valleys are DISASTERS (surprisingly spelled correctly!)
Valleys are INSTANT
Valleys are TENTS

What to do in Dark Valleys
Refuse MOM (what?!?)
Remember LIFE
Rely on DIEGO (what can I say, he's one of her best friends!)

3 Important things about Shadows
Shadows are always WIRD (there it is again!)
Shadows cannot SKIP
There is no shadow HERE

I'm not even sure what to think about this...

:)