Weeks 10 & 11: One Thousand Gifts

I was SO sad to see our study of One Thousand Gifts come to an end!! But I am SO grateful to have shared this journey with all of the women who fulfilled their commitment to stick it out with us in our study on Thursday night and SO thankful for those of you who have endured these weeks with us online! As I said in the beginning, this was a project that was MANY months in the making. I did a lot of praying over this particular study and spent literally months praying for the women God was going to bring to this study. I hope this book challenged your thinking on gratitude and thankfulness. I pray that this book has been a blessing to you and that you've been encouraged to share the principles found in this book with those closest to you.

I'm going to do something a little different with these last two chapters and simply jot down a few quotes within the chapters that really struck a chord with me personally. And then, as always, I will add the video sessions at the bottom.

Chapter 10, Empty To Fill

"A life contemplating the blessings of Christ becomes a life acting the love of Christ."

"Jesus is about to let flesh be broken with nail, heart be broken with rejection, the chains be broken with bleeding love. And in His last hours before His earthly end, He doesn't run out to buy something or catch a flight to go see something, but He wraps a towel around His waist and kneels low to take the feet of His forsakers gently in hand and wash away the grime between their toes."

"I am blessed. I can bless. Imagine! I could let Him make me the gift!"

"Christian hands never clasp and He doesn't give the gifts for gain because a gift can never stop being a gift - it is always meant to be given."

"He calls us to serve, and it is Him whom we serve, but He, very God, kneels down to serve us as we serve. The servant-hearted ever serve alone. Spend the whole of your one wild and beautiful life investing in many lives, and God simply will not be outdone. God extravagantly pays back everything we give away and exactly in the currency that is not of this world but the one we year for: Joy in Him."

"The way through the pain is to reach out to others in theirs."

"I give happy thanks for the daily mess with a smile a mile wide, because this is again my chance to wholeheartedly serve God, to do full-bodied eucharisteo with the hands and the heart and the lips. I can count each task a gift, pure eucharisteo. Grace! This work - the thousand endless jobs - they each give the opportunity for one to become the gift, a thousand times over! Because with every one of the thousand, endless jobs, I become the gift to God and to others because this work is the public God serving, the daily liturgy of thanks, the completing of the Communion service with my service."

Here is the video session with Ann Voskamp for Chapter 10. Don't forget to go to the bottom of this page first and pause the music from my playlist on the blog so that you can hear the audio. :)

One Thousand Gifts: Chapter 10 from Bloom (in)courage on Vimeo.

Chapter 11, The Joy of Intimacy

"He will rejoice over you with joyful songs." (Zephaniah 3:17)

"It really is like C.S. Lewis argued that the most fundamental thing is no HOW we think of God, but rather WHAT God thinks of us. 'How God thinks of us is not only more important, but infinitely more important.' Years of Christian discipleship, Bible study, churchgoing had been about me thinking about God; practicing eucharisteo was the very first I had really considered at length what God thought of me - this ridiculous and relentlessly pursuing love, so bold. Everywhere, everything, LOVE!"

"Gratitude is the most fruitful way of deepening your consciousness that you are... a divine choice." (Perhaps one of my FAVORITE lines in the entire book!) ;)

"Nothing I am counts for anything, but all that I count of Him counts for everything - seeing eyes might illuminate the glory of Christ in all."

"... we're called to do more than believe in God; we're called to live in God. To enter into Christ and Christ enter into us - to cohabit."

Here is the video session with Ann Voskamp for Chapter 11. Don't forget to go to the bottom of this page first and pause the music from my playlist on the blog so that you can hear the audio. :)

One Thousand Gifts Chapter 11 from Bloom (in)courage on Vimeo.

Blessings my friend! Again - thank you for journeying with us!! We have LOVED every minute of our time with you!!

Finding JOY in the JOurneY,



www.wendybender.blogspot.com

Weeks 8 & 9: One Thousand Gifts

I am couple weeks behind and I hope that you can forgive me! I decided to go ahead and post both for chapters 8 & 9 and in 2 weeks I will post for chapters 10 & 11 since December 1 will be our last (boo-hoo) week for this study together.

It is my sincere prayer that you have enjoyed each of these weeks as we dove headlong into this idea of gratitude. I pray that we will each find our own way of living out Eucharisteo every single day of our lives!

Chapter 8, How Will He Not Also, is a very honest chapter about Ann's life. What she would describe as "messy".

Stories. We all have them. Some of them as messy. Most of them contain a balance of joy and pain... but each one containing a single common ingredient... GRACE!

The big question... Can we learn how to be grateful through situations we don't understand? Can we trust when we don't know what's coming ahead?

If you are ANYTHING like me - you might be a bit familiar with a need to control everything. But God asks that we TRUST. And that means leaning back and letting God take over. And taking over EVERY aspect of our daily lives.

"Stress brings no joy." Ann says on page 147. We can say we are joyful... but when we live in stress... we cannot possibly be living in joy. Joy comes from trust. "Stress isn't only a joy stealer. The way we respond to it can be sin." (page 146) Ouch! What are we saying when we are stressed? That we can't TRUST in our wonderful Creator?

How do we slow ourselves? Because remember it... LIFE is NOT an EMERGENCY!

My favorite part of this entire chapter rests on page 156. She says this...

"Wasn't that too His way with Moses? 'When My glory passes by, I will put you in a cleft in the rock and cover you with my hand until I have passed by. Then I will remove My hand and you will see My back.' (Ex 33:22-23 NIV). Is that it? When it gets dark, it's only because God had tucked me in a cleft of the rock and covered me, protected with His hand? In the pitch, I feel like I'm falling, sense the bridge giving way, God long absent." She goes on... "God is in the tremors. Dark is the holiest ground, the glory passing by."

SUCH a beautiful analogy!!

When the way is dark... and all of us will encounter that darkness sometime or another... it is only then when God is covering us... protecting us from falling. He is our rock. He hides us to protect with His very hand. Oh praise God!!!

Thank you Jesus. Thank you Jesus!

We are called to live a life of YES! To THANK HIM in the midst of whatever He gives.

Thank you Jesus!

Below is the video from week eight. (Remember to scroll to the bottom of the blog to pause the music from my playlist in order to hear this video.)

One Thousand Gifts: Chapter Eight from Bloom (in)courage on Vimeo.

Chapter 9, Go Lower, is a beautiful chapter of perspective. Ann talks about the perspective of her sweet little girl taking pictures... and how much different things look when you're only 3 feet tall. The looking up at everything. Just the way God desires for His children to look UP to Him!

We learn through this amazing chapter that my perspective changes when I see everything as something I don't deserve. Only THEN does it truly become a gift!

"The joy" Ann says, "makes life large." (page 167)

Oh how I want that!

Ann talks about expectations that we have. She says on page 169, "Expectations kill relationships - especially with God." And what happens when we expect the blessings to come and they don't? How does faith play a role in that then? Or does it?

Because all gifts... ALL gifts Ann says... are "unmerited luxuries".

On page 170 she says it beautifully... "Is it only when our lives are emptied that we're surprised how truly full our lives were?"

So how do we live a life of gratitude... being thankful with ALL we have... NOW... so that we don't miss the beauty of how full our lives are and risk looking back with regret?

"He must increase, but I must decrease." John 3:30.

"The FEELING of joy begins in the ACTION of thanksgiving." (page 176).

And I love what she says on the top of page 178... "And what do I really deserve? Thankfully, God never gives what is deserved, but instead, God graciously, passionately offers gifts - our bodies, our time, our very lives. God does not give rights but imparts responsibilities - response-abilities - inviting us to respond to His love-gifts."

She ends with this on page 181... "I can't be receptive to God unless I receive what He gives."

Let's receive what He gives. With palms up... let's allow Him to pour out to us the blessings we don't deserve. And together - let's respond with THANKSGIVING!

Below is the video from week nine. (Remember to scroll to the bottom of the blog to pause the music from my playlist in order to hear this video.)

One Thousand Gifts: Chapter Nine from Bloom (in)courage on Vimeo.

Finding JOY in the JOurneY,



www.wendybender.blogspot.com

Week Seven: One Thousand Gifts

"You have said, 'Seek My face.' My heart says to You, 'Your face, Lord, do I seek.'" Psalm 27:8 (ESV)






I can't help but remind myself through each of these chapters... "Hammer to the nail... building the wall of joy... so that we have somewhere to land, something to lean against... something to help us to stand when the crises comes." And they will come. "Hammer to the nail. Hammer to the nail."

Chapter 7 was all about being broken. The chapter about... toast. And brothers. And the ugly that can creep so quickly into our broken messes. Even in the midst of counting gifts. The beautiful blessings. The ugly can creep in so easily if we allow it an entry point.

And for Ann, this entry point for the ugly was the morning when brothers broke into battle over.. toast.

And isn't it always the small things that get the best of us? The insignificant? And why is that? How and WHY do we allow the small things to get at us the most? Could it be that it's not really about toast at all? Could it really be that there is something more going on?

Ann longs on page 124, to return to the moon.

Remember the moon?

Ah - the beauty of the moon.

"Why?" She asks. "Can I just go back to the moon and the brazen glory?"

And it's a reminder of the story of The Transfiguration (Luke 9:28-36). The story of where Jesus went up to a mountain and took with him Peter, James and John. It would be a time of prayer. "And as Jesus was praying, the appearance of His face changed, and His clothing became dazzling white." (vs 29). Moses and Elijah appear before them and my bible records this event as being a "glorious sight to see." (vs 31). And then it was Peter who blurted out what I find myself relating to well, "Master this is wonderful!" (vs 33).

Oh - if we could only stay on the mountaintop with Jesus!

If we could only live in the blessing every second of every day!

If we could only feel this much joy all the time!

But we can't. The mountaintop isn't where the real life is lived out. And Ann knows it. She says on page 124, "But there's always the decent from the mount. The meeting of the crowd, the complaining, the cursing. Obvious and immediate transfigurations exhilarate the faith, but the faithful can forget transfigurations, faces that once changed appearances. We betray Who we know. Didn't Peter?"

WOW.

Didn't Peter?

Oh that's right. He really did.

... "I don't even know this Man." (Luke 22:57)
... "No I'm not [one of them]." (Luke 22:58)
... "I don't know what you're talking about." (Luke 22:60)

Three times. He denied. And He betrayed. Don't we too? There' ugly stuff - but there are also ugly people. And sometimes aren't we?

There's always the decent from the mount.
There's always a time when we have to get back to the real world.

And she asks the question that my heart longs to know the answer to, "How do I see grace, give thanks, find joy in this sin-stinking place?" (page 125).

That's the question we desire to have an answer for.

HOW?

Is it possible?

It's driving the hammer. Hammer to nail. Discipline. Practice. "The discipline of thanks only comes with practice." (page 135)

And it's hard. It's really hard. A daily struggle. But VITAL to our survival in this sin-stinking place. VITAL!

Ann chooses in the moment... albeit not immediately... to choose joy. To find out what the REAL problem is.

Because it's never just about toast. There's always more going on. Something else.

Ann so eloquently tells the story of Jacob and his wrestle with God as depicted in Genesis, chapter 32. The story of Jacob wrestling with a man... an unknown man... the day before making peace with his brother, Esau. The wrestle with this man left Jacob with a hip joint out of place. The sinew of the thigh. (Sinew means tendon, but also means the source of strength and power.)

The man... "breaks Jacob." (page 137) But Jacob refuses to let go. And he doesn't even know who this man is whom he's wrestling. "Just a man in the dark, a man he couldn't see. And in the black, all that night, it was the face of God over him that he was struggling against." (page 137)

"God is behind the face."

And there's always the wrestle before we can see God.

"The Lord has to break us down at the strongest part of our self-life before He can have His own way of blessing with us." (page 138)

Glass to God. Can we really see Him behind the faces?

Behind the faces of those we are angry with?
Behind the faces of those who are ugly with ingratitude?

It's a challenge that's for sure! And I know the struggle well.

Resentment or gratitude. Which will you chose?

Because it's not just the recording of gifts that's going to change us. It's the LIVING IT OUT.

We were created to bring honor and glory to the Father. HOW will we intentionally CHOOSE joy? Because we were created to point to Him!

Keep your gaze on heaven friends! Keep your gaze on heaven!

Below is the video from week seven. (Remember to scroll to the bottom of the blog to pause the music from my playlist in order to hear this video.)

One Thousand Gifts Chapter 7 from Bloom (in)courage on Vimeo.

Finding JOY in the JOurneY,



www.wendybender.blogspot.com

Week Six: One Thousand Gifts

"One thing I ask from the Lord, this only do I seek: that I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, to gaze on the beauty of the Lord and to seek Him in His temple."
Psalm 27:4 (NIV)

We had another amazing night at book club last night! I have to admit I am sad that we are already half way through the book. As one of our participants said, it feels as though we have to do the book over again to really get this discipline deep down in our souls. And it's true. There is so much to this book that I would encourage you to take the time to read it through again if you get a chance. I found that I got SO much more out of it when I took the time to read it again and I even found sometimes that reading ALOUD was very helpful as well. Ann's writing style can be a little hard at times... to fully comprehend, so that is just a way I found works really well to really absorb what's she's trying to communicate.

Please know that we are PRAYING for each and every one of you all the time! We are SUPER excited for this book club - and too, for those of you who are joining us online - we are THRILLED to have you! We are praying that God would reveal Himself to you through the pages of this brilliant book, One Thousand Gifts.

This week we reviewed Chapter six, What Do You Want? The Place of Seeing God. This was the story about the moon! On page 102, Ann's sweet husband, who understands her souls desire for finding beauty... for counting gifts (she had already been naming gifts for many months at this point and had passed 1,000), tells her, "You will want to see this."

In the rushing and chaos of her day - he interrupts her softly, inviting her to see something he KNOWS she won't want to miss. THE MOON. But for a moment, in her rush to put food for 8 on the table, she finds herself slightly irritated. Not at him, so much, as the disturbance of the rushing.

And for a moment I am Ann. And I can feel the irritation. I've been distracted... disturbed... momentarily by something that takes me away from the concentration that "the thing" is begging from me... and I can feel the same frustrations in myself.

But he... the husband... who knows the woman counting graces would be so hurt to have missed the opportunity to SEE this... THE MOON! "The moon rounds immense, incandescent globe grazing ours." (page 105)

But then again, it's just a moon. We'll see another. Or will we?
But then again, it's just a moon. We've seen one before. Or have we?

SEEING the moon THAT night was as if she were FINALLY seeing with eyes wide open.

Surely there had been another moon so... so magnificant before... but where had she been? Sleeping the whole time? And HOW had she missed such beauty... beauty that was RIGHT in front of her?

And yet aren't we that way?

Don't we notice beauty around us - but truly fail to SEE the beauty in it? The God-beauty?

On page 107 she speaks of Jacob, waking from sleep before full moon rising, "Then Jacob awoke from his sleep and said, 'Surely the Lord is in this place, and I wasn't even aware of it!'" (Genesis 28:16-17).

Isn't Jacob's words, our words? SURELY the Lord is in THIS place, and I wasn't even AWARE of it!

Surely I have been a witness to some beautiful sun rises... but did I fail to notice that the Lord was in it?
Surely I have seen the birth of my child... but did I fail to SEE that the Lord was there too?

And what about in the trees, or in rain, or in the falling leaves or the sunset or the ocean?

Are we really, truly choosing to SEE with eyes wide open?

"The only place we have to come before we die is the place of seeing God." (page 108)

Of SEEING God.

That's it!

I want to SEE God. In everything.

In the good. In the ordinary. In the spectacular. In the pain. In the suffering. In the light. And the dark.

I want to SEE God.

Because God is good and I am always loved.

Always.

I want to be paying attention.

On page 111 Ann writes, "I pay tribute to God by paying attention."

I want to be paying attention. I don't want to MISS it!

Because what if THIS is the last moon I will be able to SEE with these human eyes?

What if?

And Ann beckons us to ask the question of ourselves. The one she's wrestled with herself...

If I can see God in the beauty, can I, too, then, go back into the chaos of my life and find beauty THERE?

Can I see God HERE? And in turn can I find JOY here too?

Because joy can be found where God is found... so can I find God here? In the mess I've made? In the pain I've suffered? In my frailty and weakness?

God CAN be there too!

She closes the chapter with this on pages 120 and 121...

"The world I live in is loud and blurring and toilets plug and I get speeding tickets and the dog gets sick all over the back step and I forget everything and these six kids lean hard into me all day to teach and raise and lead and I fail hard and there are real souls that are at stake and how long do I really have to figure out how to live full of grace, full of joy - before these six beautiful children fly the coop and my mothering days fold up quiet? How do you open the eyes to see how to take the daily, domestic, workday vortex and invert it into the dome of an everyday cathedral? Could I go back to my life and pray with eyes wide open? Praying with eyes wide open is the only way to pray without ceasing."

Can we see... and count gifts (praying)... with eyes wide open?

Will you choose to SEE the amazing gifts He gives?

Because, truly, they are ALL around us!

Let's choose to SEE them together!

Praying for you!

Below is the video from week six. (Remember to scroll to the bottom of the blog to pause the music from my playlist in order to hear this video.)

One Thousand Gifts: Chapter 6 from Bloom (in)courage on Vimeo.

Finding JOY in the JOurneY,



www.wendybender.blogspot.com

Week Five: One Thousand Gifts

“Naked I came from my mother’s womb, and naked shall I return there. The LORD gave, and the LORD has taken away; Blessed be the name of the LORD.” Job 1:21 (NKJV)

Chapter 5, What in the World, in all the World, is Grace, was a difficult chapter. This was the chapter about the hard eucharisteo. Ann tells us the story of her sweet 7-year-old boy, Levi, who when working in the barn doing chores, puts his hand through a fan blade. As she runs to her son, unsure of what she'll see when she gets there, fear fills her body. And she knows... that THIS might be it. "The hard eucharisteo." As she describes on page 80. And she admits, "Now I know that I don't want to know it yet... Ever."

We pick back up on the bottom of page 80, top of page 81, when Ann and Levi return to the house following a three-hour hospital visit. "He has a hand." Ann says to her mom who knows the loss of a child. Who has lived the hardest eucharisteo. "He's cut up bad. But only the index is broken. They're booking us for a surgeon."

And in that moment... relief.
In that moment... praise.

But she wrestles with the tough question of this word... grace.

"And if his hand had been right sheared off?" She asks. "What of God's grace then? Can I ask that question?"

It's one thing to be thankful and to praise God in the good times. When things are going well. When we are in good health, when we are surrounded with the ones we love. When we get good grades. When our marriage is flourishing. When it's sunny. When bills get paid.

But what happens in those hard moments when God's grace is more difficult to see? What then?

Perspective is found on page 82 when Ann reflects back on what she hears on the radio on their way home from the hospital. "The obituaries after the noon farm news. A 13-year-old Mennonite boy, just down the road from the red-roofed dairy farm my husband grew up on. A farm boy, an accident. Date of death. Siblings. Funeral details. No mention of the state of his mama's heart, delta fractures slitting her through."

A boy. Only 13-years-old. Death. Tragic. Sudden. No warning.

Isn't THIS this hard stuff we've feared?

We're all faced with these hard days.

Maybe it was a call from a doctor... bad test results.
Maybe it was a call from a sibling... death of a parent.
Maybe it was a call from the school... a hurt child.

Maybe, like me, it was a call from a friend. A call that would rattle me to the core when I was only 18. Nothing up to that point had been harder. A call that came from a classmate in the middle of the afternoon. "Are you alone?" He asked. WHY was he asking this? Why in the world would it matter? "Yes." I said. "What happened?" And then I felt it. Maybe it's what I heard in his silence. Maybe it was the peircing sound of the silence that followed that gave way for fear to seep in. But I knew something bad had happened. Nothing could have prepared me. I hadn't rehearsed this part. And then it came, "Robbie's been in an accident, Wendy. And he didn't make it."

"He didn't make it."

In that single moment I couldn't define these words. I could not make them out. I heard him... but I didn't know what that meant. Didn't make it?

And then the whole world went black.

A shooting accident that claimed the life of my friend was a turning point in my life. It's amazing how these things change us. For me it was as if the life I had known up to that point ended. And a new one began. The old me was no longer. I was now looking through the lens of grief. Pain. Sadness. The hard eucharisteo.

And I had known Jesus. I had known about this love. This forgiveness. This grace?

But where was grace the day my sweet friend was ripped away, violently, from this world?

And I read it again on the pages of this book and I am reminded... "God is always good and I am always loved." (page 100)

Always.

And isn't that what life is? A balance of the grace moments and curse moments? And then what about thanksgiving? If in the grace moments we are thankful... what are we to do in the curse moments?

Perspective.

I love how her eyes are opened to the perspective.

"I hang up the phone" she says, "and I stand for a long while, just watching Levi breathe. Watching Levi live. He had an extra serving of ice cream on his plate last night and licked the mint right off his plate. He might not have. He slept in a bed last night, on clean sheets, and beside his brother. What if he hadn't? He woke and walked out across the dew grass this morning, the blades all sewed up in dangled gossamer of spiders. Why him? He worked alongside his dad in the barn, swept the broom hard; and when his dad said he was growing quite the muscles, he had laughed. He might not have. Who deserves any grace?" (page 93)

"Why are we allowed two?" Ann asks. "Why lavished with three? A whole string of days? Isn't even one grace enough?" (page 93)

Perspective. How we see.

And how can these pain moments lead to gratitude? CAN we be thankful through the pain? In the midst of pain?

How can we possibly be thankful for the death of a child? For the ominous diagnosis? For the accidents and the senseless crimes and the pure heartbreak? How?

Because the pain will come. For each and every one of us. One day. Maybe today. Maybe next month. Maybe 12 years from now. But it will come. And there's no warning. It will. Just. Come.

In chapter five's video I am reminded of the resurrection.

The resurrection was bloody. It was painful. It was messy. It was the hardest eucharisteo the world has ever seen.

And yet THROUGH the nail-pierced hands we can find hope.
THROUGH the blood-soaked rags we can find strength.
THROUGH the brutal beating we can find refuge.

Not IN this pain... but THROUGH this pain.

Because God wastes nothing. He "makes everything work out according to His plan." (Eph 1:11).

He wastes nothing. Not even your pain. Because God's grace... really is enough.

In the video Ann so appropriately illustrates how gratitude NOW paves the way for dealing with the darkness LATER. She says there's no warning for darkness, but we can prepare ourselves by practicing the discipline of gratitude so that when the days come we have a foundation to stand on.

It's what she calls the ugly-beautiful. "That which is perceived as ugly transfigures into beautiful." And she continues, "The ugly can be beautiful. The dark can give birth to life; suffering can deliver." (page 99)

God is always good and I am always loved. There it is again.

She closes the chapter... "Because eucharisteo is how Jesus, at the Last Supper, showed us how to transfigure all things - take the pain that is given, give thanks for it, and transform it into a joy that fulfills all emptiness."

God wants our questioning of Him to be smaller and our desire for Him to be bigger. Because I am convinced that He is using the pain in our lives to transfigure it and redeem it into something beautiful that only He can use for His glory! The question now is will we allow Him full access to transfigure our ugly into beautiful?

I am praying for each and every one of you.

Thank you for continuing on this journey with us!

Below is the video from week five. (Remember to scroll to the bottom of the blog to pause the music from my playlist in order to hear this video.)

One Thousand Gifts: Chapter 5 from Bloom (in)courage on Vimeo.

We would LOVE to hear your story of redemption! How has God taken the ugly in your life and made it beautiful? In class on Thursday nights we are each participating in a challenge... To reflect on and record 3 evidences of God's grace towards you. And if you are willing - we'd LOVE for you to use this place to share with us how God is transfiguring the pain you've experienced. Simply click on the COMMENTS link just below this post.

Finding JOY in the JOurneY,



www.wendybender.blogspot.com

Week Four: One Thousand Gifts

"We are merely moving shadows, and all our busy rushing ends in nothing. We heap up wealth, not knowing who will spend it." Psalm 39:6 (NLT)



Chapter 4, A Sanctuary Of Time, was a PACKED chapter. I will admit that when I first read this chapter I said to myself, "Could this really be ALL about a bubble? A soap sud? Really?" But as we discussed last night - it is SO much more than that. This chapter really challenges readers to slow down. To discover what it means to live this one life well. To experience the full life in the midst of the hurry and the running and the getting to.. the... next... thing.

How do we slow time down?

How do we stop living life as if it were an emergency? Because life is NOT an emergency!

And what does it mean to have not MORE time... but ENOUGH time?

Ann begins this chapter with her observation of a another gift to add to her list... #362, Suds... all color in sun.

And it's this sud that opens her eyes wide to the gift of time. Making time. As she says on page 64, "I only see it because I'm looking..."

I only see it because I'm looking.

What other things do we miss because we are in such a hurry? What other beautiful gifts have we allowed to pass us by simply because we were not paying attention?

Could it be that this hunt for gifts... for all things beautiful... is JUST the thing that will allow us to slow time down?

Hurry makes us hurt... (isn't that called stress? And don't we do that to ourselves... unnecessarily?)

Hurry empties a soul.

Think about it. I was just saying last week that all would be right in the world if I could just have ONE more day in the week to get accomplished the things I need to get accomplished. Just one more day I begged for. But is it really MORE time I need? Or is it ENOUGH time that I need? Because wouldn't I just fill that ONE MORE day with even MORE unnecessary things? Who really wants more time for worry? Guilt? Shame? More running of errands. More spending money we don't have. More schedules. More crises. Really? Is that what I want?

I love the beautiful way Ann writes it on the top of page 68... "I just want time to do my one life well."

That's it!

My hearts desire is to take this one life I have been given and live it... well! Oh how I long to hear the words of my Savior... "Well done good and faithful servant." (Matt 25:21)

Receiving gifts... naming them... and thanking God for them... is our only hope for slowing time down because it begs for our full attention NOW. One page 69 Ann remembers the words of her sister, "Where you are, be all there." She continues, "I have lived the runner, panting ahead in worry, pounding back in regrets, terrified to live in the present, because here-time asks me to do the hardest of all: just open wide and receive."

And isn't that harder to do?

But "This"... Ann writes, "is where God is."

And I WANT to be where God is.

So could it be as easy as one simple formula... Giving thanks = more time.

I LOVE her analogy on pages 71 and 72.

In John, chapter 6, the story so many of us are familiar with, is the story of Jesus feeding 5,000. Jesus and His disciples had just crossed over the Sea of Galilee, when a huge crowd began following them. It was nearing time for the annual Passover celebration and they were in need of some food to feed themselves and the large crowd that had gathered. And there was nothing. The only thing that was available was a young boy's lunch which consisted of five barley loaves and two fish. "But what good is this with a huge crowd?" Andrew asked. (verse 9) (Oh I can SO see myself in that boy Andrew, can't you? Doubting the very One who had just come from performing all kinds of miracles. Don't we KNOW the miracle worker and still doubt His amazing abilities?)

After gathering the loaves of bread and the fish, Jesus "took the loaves and gave thanks to God and passed them out to the people." (verse 11). John goes on to write, "And they ate until they were full." Jesus even responds to His disciples, "'Now gather up the leftovers so that nothing is wasted.'" (verse 12)

Stop!

What just happened?

Jesus had only FIVE loaves of bread. BARELY enough to feed the 13 of them... let alone FIVE THOUSAND!

Jesus had five loaves of bread and what did He do?

He gave thanks. Those two words. The "bridge words" as Ann calls them. "The crossing over that took the not enough and made it enough."

He gave thanks. There it is again... Eucharisteo.

"Jesus embraces His not enough... He gives thanks... And there is more than enough."

That's it. Again. The miracle of thanks.

Oh what being grateful does. It multiplies the blessing!

So... Jesus gives thanks for the five loaves of bread and it multiplies.
Could we give thanks, then, for the moments so that those, too, can multiply?

Is that the secret to getting more time?

Ann says it best on page 72, "The real problem of life is never a lack of time. The real problem of life - in my life - is lack of thanksgiving."

"Life is a dessert." Ann says, "You don't wolf it down." (page 77)

Wherever you are... be all there.
Life is not an emergency.
Giving thanks = more time.
Slow down long enough to see the miracles.

Because I'm with Ann... "I want to savor long whatever time holds."

And it IS fleeting.

Below is the video from week four. (Remember to scroll to the bottom of the blog to pause the music from my playlist in order to hear this video.)

One Thousand Gifts: Chapter 4 from Bloom (in)courage on Vimeo.

Finding JOY in the JOurneY,



www.wendybender.blogspot.com

Week Three: One thousand Gifts

"I will praise the name of God with a song, and will magnify him with thanksgiving." Psalm 69:30 (KJV)




Can I just say how BLESSED I am to be doing life alongside of some amazing women?? Last night we wrapped up chapter three of our study on Ann Voskamp's book, One Thousand Gifts.

Chapter three, First Flight, was an uplifting and encouraging chapter. Unlike the first two chapters, which were a little more difficult to get through, this chapter felt like we FINALLY arrived at the meat of the book.

What started out as a DARE from a friend to list 1,000 things she was grateful for, truly turned into her life's mission... a "hunt" as described by Ann herself, to find all things beautiful in a messy, messy world.

We were all encouraged by the words Ann quotes on page 44 from Pierre de Caussade, "When one is thirsty one quenches one's thirst by drinking, not by reading books which treat of this condition." "If we are dying of thirst", Ann says, "passively reading books about water quenches little; the only way to quench the parched mouth is to close the book and dip the hand into water and bring it to the lips. If we thirst, we'll have to drink. I would have to DO SOMETHING."

Kind of like reading God's word. We can read the book all day long. We can memorize scripture. We can be filled with knowledge of His truths, His grace and His love... but if we want it to change us... to REALLY change us from the inside out... we have to DO something. Reading about how to walk in His love will do little for us. We have to take the first steps of obedience and faith.

And so we see Ann's list begin. This naming of 1,000 things she is grateful for:

1.) Morning shadows across the old floor.
2.) Jam piled high on toast.
3.) Cry of blue jay from high in the spruce.

And she says as she begins, "This writing it down - it is sort of like... unwrapping love."

Philippians 4:11-12 is such an inspiring piece of scripture, "I have learned how to be content with whatever I have. I know how to live on almost nothing or with everything. I have learned the secret of living in every situation, whether it is with a full stomach or empty, with plenty or little."

That boy Paul... oh he got it! I want to learn how to live this out too... don't you?

Ann says, "Gratitude in the midst of death and divorce and debt - that's the language I've got to learn to speak - because that's the kind of life I'm living, the kind I have to solve." (page 47)

And so as Martin Luther King once said, "If you want to change the world, pick up your pen."

Can it really be that simple? Perhaps!

Questions for discussion:

1.) Ann accepts a dare from a friend to begin a list, not of gifts she wants, but of gifts she already has. A gratitude list.

Have you ever made a gratitude list? If so, what prompted you to do so? How did the experience impact your relationship with God?

I can say from personal experience that starting my list of gratitude changed my life in MORE ways than I can ever tell you! I think for me, it was in the discovery of the little things I had always taken for granted. Here's some of those from my own personal journal...

11.) Smiles from a friend.
34.) Date night with the hubs.
59.) S'mores at summer bonfires.
75.) The smell of cinnamon.
93.) Air condition.
141.) Bowl full of beautiful red, ripe strawberries.

And so, too, began my list. Could I make it to 1,000? I will see. I'm on my way... 527 to be exact. And still counting.

Is it difficult? Not really. Why? Because beauty is really all around us. Every day. The question shouldn't be can we do it... instead the question ought to be, can we SLOW DOWN long enough to SEE what's been there all along?

2.) Among the first gifts on Ann's list are these:

~ Morning shadows across the old floor.
~ Jam piled high on toast.
~ Cry of blue jay from high in the spruce.
~ Leafy life scent of the florist shop.
~ Wind flying cold wild in hair.

Each gift appeals to one of the five senses - something Ann can see, taste, hear, smell or feel. Thinking back on the last 24 hours, use your senses to name five things for which you are grateful - your own mini gratitude list.

3.) In reading Philippians 4:11-12 (above), Ann discovers, "the secret to living joy in every situation, the full life of eucharisteo." It is in the apostle Paul's statement, "I have learned" (page 47). Take a moment to think of a few things that have brought joy or a feeling of contentment to your life recently. Did you have to learn these things or work at them, or did they just happen, like happy coincidences? How do you understand the relationship between learning or practicing gratitude and experiencing joy?

4.) "This dare to write down one thousand things I love... is a dare to name all the ways that God loves me." (page 59) How does gratitude open the door to ever-increasing awareness of God's love for you? How might you take up the dare to name the ways God loves you?

Did you ever think of it that way before? By naming all the gifts is like naming all the ways God loves YOU?

Think about that the next time you see a beautiful sunrise. When you thank God - be specific in your thankfulness. "Thank you God for giving ME this beautiful sunrise this morning!"

Or what about the next time you hear a beautiful song on the radio. When you thank God - be specific. "Thank you God for giving ME this beautiful song today. The words are so encouraging... it was JUST what I needed!"

I believe NOTHING makes God more pleased with us than when we receive each gift He gives with an offer of Thanksgiving. Pure Eucharisteo. THIS is receiving His grace. THIS is FULL living. Joy-filled living.

And so it is with hammer that we drive the nails... to "rebuild a life - eucharisteo precedes the miracle." And it's not the blanket thanksgiving that changes lives. It is the specificity of each gift. "Life-changing gratitude", Ann says, "does not fasten to a life unless nailed through with one very specific nail at a time."

It's "when I give thanks for the seemingly microscopic, that I make a place for God to grow within me." If I am serious about changing... for bettering my life... for making a difference... than it has to start with my thankfulness for even the seemingly microscopic.

Ann closes the chapter with a statement... a powerful statement... "... life change comes when we receive life with thanks and ask for nothing to change." (page 61)

Thank you for joining us on our journey to joy through gratitude!

Below is the video from week three. (Remember to scroll to the bottom of the blog to pause the music from my playlist in order to hear this video.)

One Thousand Gifts- Chapter Three from Bloom (in)courage on Vimeo.

Finding JOY in the JOurneY,



www.wendybender.blogspot.com

Week Two: One Thousand Gifts

"Those who sacrifice thank offerings honor me, and to the blameless I will show my salvation." Psalm 50:23 (NIV)


We had another amazing group study last evening as we journeyed through chapter two of our study on Ann Voskamp's book, One Thousand Gifts.

Chapter two, A Word To Live and Die By, was a RICH chapter filled with all kinds of nuggets. We believe THIS is the chapter that really sets up the rest of the book. It sort of lays the ground work for what's to come in all of the later chapters.

The mutual feeling among most of us last evening was that THIS, too, was a difficult chapter in it's own right. A deep chapter. A thought-provoking chapter. But I think we were able to do some digging and found some real eye-opening wisdom within the pages of this chapter. We are praying that God will continue to open our hearts and minds to the truth and biblical applications of this book. We are boldly asking Him to change us in the process - to become women who find ourselves passionately in love with the Father!

Ann begins the chapter with 2 stories... one of a nightmare she is startled by wherein she is dying of cancer. It feels so real to her that she describes it like this, "waking to the crack of a nightmare, this violent shock through the veins..." (page 26). This nightmare scares her so that it jolts her into thinking... really thinking about this life and how MUCH she wants to live fully. She's not ready to die. She wrestles with the question on page 27, "Is that the message of nightmares and dreams? To live either FULLY alive... or in empty nothingness?"

And what does it mean to live FULLY? Really?

Is it the accumulating of more things?
Is it the visiting of more places?
Is it the packing of more events into our schedules?

Or could it be...

The deepening of our relationship with God?
The richness of our earthly relationships with others?
The laser-focused view of our eternal home in heaven?

Yes... I think THAT is where the full life is!

Ann continues with her second story of a letter she receives from her father-in-law who's wife had just recently passed away. In his own probable wrestling of life and death, he asks the question of his son and daughter-in-law, "Thinking on the beginning of this year, who does He call to come Home? Is it me, Lord? May I be ready. Or us. Whoever." (page 28)

She then asks herself on page 29, "Whoever. Ready for the end here. Whoever. Ready for the first meeting of Him there. Whoever. Soon. Will I have lived fully - or just empty?"

Living with the end in mind... will we be ready? And regardless of the answer - how do we live fully so we are fully ready to die?

Ann challenges us to begin thinking, then, what is it? If living the fullness of life isn't seeing more, doing more, being more, then what is it? Where is it? Isn't it here? Isn't the fullness of life RIGHT here? In this very moment. On page 31 she says, "Isn't it here? The wonder? Why do I spend so much of my living hours struggling to see it? Do we truly stumble so blind that we must be affronted with blinding magnificence for our blurry soul-sight to recognize grandeur?" She goes on to say, "I don't need more time to breathe so that I may experience more locales, posses more, accomplish more. Because wonder really could be here - for the seeing eyes."

Is it HERE for us to SEE... this fullness of life? And can we really SEE it?

Questions for discussion:

1.) A terrifying nightmare in which Ann dreams she is dying of cancer becomes a catalyst that helps her realize how much she really wants to live. How do you generally respond to your dreams? Do you write them down and ponder them, or do you not pay much attention to them?

2.) Studying the word EUCHARISTEO helped Ann to identify "holy joy" as the "more" she had been seeking (page 32). What do you think might be the key to unlocking your desire for the fuller life right where you are in the midst of your ordinary days?

We spent a lot of time on this word... Eucharisteo. What a beautiful word! And here is what we shared with the group:

Eucharisteo
Root Word = Charis (grace)
Jesus took the bread and saw it as grace and gave THANKS.
He knew it to be a GIFT and gave THANKS.
Greek Word = Chara (joy)
As long as THANKS is possible, then JOY is always possible.

Think of it like a braid, this word Eucharisteo...
Charis. Grace.
Eucharisteo. Thanksgiving.
Chara. Joy.

Grace was provided to us by the Father (sending his son, Jesus).
Thanks is given by us to the Father.
Joy is received.
Through thank offerings is where we find JOY.

Eucharisteo - Thanksgiving - always precedes the miracle!

Eucharisteo - the Greek word with the hard meaning and the harder meaning to live - THIS is the only way to live... EMPTY to FULL!

3.) The author recalls stories from Jesus' life that illustrate the power of Eucharisteo, of thanksgiving: the Last Supper, the raising of Lazarus, the condemnation of Korazin, and Bethsaida (pages 34-37). When considering the context of these stories, we discover that Jesus is within HOURS of his own death, is grieved by the death of a dear friend, and is rejected by entire towns that experienced His miracles.

Why do you think Jesus chooses to offer thanks at such times?

Could it be that He KNEW what His mission was... WHY He had come to this earth... and He was simply leaving an example for us to live by? Jesus knew His own death was imminent. And he chose to give THANKS anyway! On page 36 Ann writes this, "Jesus offers THANKSGIVING for even that which will break Him and crush Him and wound Him and yield a bounty of joy (chara)." The part that brings me to utter tears is this, "And then what does Jesus directly do, in the face of apparent failure, when no one responded to His teaching and things didn't work out at all? He lives out Eucharisteo. In the midst of what seems a mess, in the tripping up and stumbling down of all hopes, Jesus gives THANKS?" I absolutely LOVE that she ends that with a question mark.

Is it really in the THANKS that real JOY can be found?

How does Jesus' use of gratitude in difficult circumstances inform or challenge your view of what it means to give thanks to God?

Ann ends this chapter with her apparent epiphany spilled onto the pages of 38 and 39. In review of the all-familiar story of Jesus healing the 10 lepers in Luke 17, Ann shares with us her discovery of the word sozo. In the story, Jesus heals all 10 lepers and sends them on their way. One leper decides to come back and thank Jesus for His healing. Jesus asks this leper... this one grateful leper, "Where are the other nine whom I also healed?" And then proceeds to tell him, "Rise and go; your faith has made you well." (Luke 17:17-19)

But hadn't Jesus already made him well with the others the first time?

In closer examination of the word Saved used in this context, the Greek translation is sozo, meaning "well" or "whole". But it's literal meaning? It is "to save". So - sozo means salvation? It means true wellness, complete wholeness. To live sozo is, then, to live the full life?

So - could it be, then, that our very saving is associated with our gratitude?

"Thanksgiving is the evidence of our acceptance of whatever He gives. Thanksgiving is our manifestation of our YES to His grace. Thanksgiving is inherent to a true salvation experience; thanksgiving is necessary to live the well, whole fullest life." (page 39)

She ends the chapter on page 41 with this question, which I believe needs to be the questions we ask ourselves...

"Eucharisteo. The way through is hard. But do I really want to be saved?"

Below is the video from week two. (Remember to scroll to the bottom of the blog to pause the music from my playlist in order to hear this video.)

One Thousand Gifts: Chapter Two from Bloom (in)courage on Vimeo.

Finding JOY in the JOurneY,



www.wendybender.blogspot.com

Week One: One Thousand Gifts

"The wisdom I proclaim is God's secret wisdom, which is hidden from human beings, but which He had already chosen for our Glory even before the world was made." 1 Cor. 2:7 (GNT)

Week one of our study on Ann Voskamp's book, One Thousand Gifts, was amazing! I am thrilled and absolutely humbled to be a part of a terrific group of women who are so hungry to learn more about becoming the woman God has called her to be! I know I have said this already more than once, but you are ALL (even those doing the online version of this study with us) a product of MANY months of prayer and I can't wait to see the wonderful things God has in store for us throughout our remaining 10 weeks together. (It's already going by too quickly!)

Chapter one, An Emptier, Fuller Life, was a difficult one. We all agreed that it was very tough to read about the death of Ann's 18-month-old sister who died in a tragic accident while her family members watched on. The start of Ann's life was rough as she struggled to understand how a loving God could possibly allow such travesty to happen. On page 12 she writes, "Where is God REALLY? How can He be good when babies die, and marriages implode, and dreams blow away, dust in the wind? Where is grace bestowed when cancer gnaws and loneliness aches and nameless places in us soundlessly die, break off without reason, erode away." She goes on to ask the question, "how do I fully live when life is full of hurt? How do I wake up to the joy and grace and beauty and all that is the fullest life when I must stay numb to losses and crushed dreams and all that empties me out?"

WOW.

And isn't that it? Isn't that that question we wrestle with when life doesn't turn out the way we had hoped it would? When marriages end bitterly, when cribs lie empty, when cancer rips the life of our loved one from us much sooner than we were ready to let them go?

This is the ugly stuff in the world. This is the stuff created from the sin that first entered the world. When Adam and Eve were ungrateful for the beauty that surrounded them and so they longed for more.

On page 15 Ann says, "Our fall was, has always been, and always will be, that we aren't satisfied in God and what He gives. We hunger for something more, something other."

We hunger for filling in a world that is starved.

Questions for discussion:

1.) "If I'm ruthlessly honest, I may have said yes to God, yes to Christianity, but really, I have lived the no." (pg 16). What do you think Ann means by this? has this ever been true for you?

Is it easy to say yes when things are going our way only? Is it easy to "sign up" for a life with Christ when we haven't yet lived the ugly this world offers?

How do we FIGHT for JOY?

Everyone has a story. We all have stories that are painful and difficult. But how do we honor God in the midst of pain and struggle. How often do we want to change the story - when we're not even the author?

There is a difference between JOY and HAPPINESS. Isn't there? Happiness is a 'feeling', where JOY is an act of the will. It is possible - wildly possible - to find JOY in the midst of pain. Because JOY is a choice.

2.) Ann describes how the death of her sister, "tears a hold in the canvas of the world" (pg 16) and later writes, "I wonder... if the rent in the canvas of our life backdrop... might actually become places to see. To see through to God" (pg 22). Is this a metaphor you find intriguing, comforting, or disturbing? How do you understand it in light of your own experience of loss?

The "tears" in the canvas of our life. Are these holes that allow light in from the love of God? Are they places and opportunities to "see" through to God.

3.) The author's narrative is right with vivid phrasing and evocative imagery. What lines or descriptions stand out for you? Why do you find them to be powerful?"

And so - the questions we wrestle with is... "How do we choose to allow the holes to become seeing-through-to-God places? To more-God places? How do I give up resentment for gratitude, gnawing anger for spilling joy? Self-focus for God-communion?" (pg 22).

"To fully life - to live full of grace and joy and all that is beauty eternal. It IS possible" (pg 23).

Will you join us on the fight for joy?

Below is the video from week one. Ann is the one in the middle. (Remember to scroll to the bottom of the blog to pause the music from my playlist in order to hear this video.)

One Thousand Gifts: Chapter One from Bloom (in)courage on Vimeo.

Tell us what YOU think!! We're so happy you've joined us on this journey... this journey to JOY!

Next week's homework: Read chapter 2 and memorize Psalm 50:23 (NIV).

Finding JOY in the JOurneY,



www.wendybender.blogspot.com