Magnoliaisms

My favorite movie of ALL times is Steel Magnolias. It's a classic! If you haven't seen it and you're into the whole chick-flick thing - this is a MUST!

I was in Target the other day and they had it on DVD for $5. I picked it up... since my only copy is a very old VHS tape.

I watched it last night. Don't know why - nothing special - it was Monday night - but I just felt like watching it is all. What I realized is - there's a lot of really cool one-liners in this movie - several of which I have used pretty frequently since I first saw the film more than 18 years ago. Here are some of my favorite lines from the movie...

• "Drum - you are the boil on the butt of humanity!"
• "Looks like the entire church has been hosed down with Pepto Bismol!"
• (referring to shoe size)... "In a good shoe, I wear a size 6, but a seven feels so good, I buy a size 8." "These are size 9" "Perfect!"
• "I don't trust anyone who does their own hair - it isn't normal!"
• "Relax! You can't screw up her hair. Just tease it and make it look like a brown football helmet."
• "You know I'd rather walk on my lips than to criticize anyone!"
• "Pink is my signature color!"
• "THIS is going in the hairdo Hall-of-Fame!"
• "The nicest thing I can say about her is all her tattoos are spelled correctly!"
• "This is football - all people want to hear about is touchdowns and injuries!"
• "I never worry, mama, cause I know you're worried enough for both of us!"
• "There's so much static electricity in this room, I pick up everything but boys and money."
• "Time marches on and eventually it marches right over your face."
• "Don't try to get on my good side, Truvy. I no longer have one!"
• "The only reason people are nice to me is I have more money than God."
• "Oh, Sammy's so confused he don't know whether to scratch his watch or wind his butt."
• "If you don't have anything nice to say, come sit by me."
• "I have a strict policy - nobody cries alone in my presence!"
• "Wow - I'm gonna paint my front door red and call myself Elizabeth Arden!"
• "I'm not crazy, I've just been a very bad mood for the last 40 years!"
• "Why are you in such a good mood - did you run over a small child or something?"
• "The only thing that separates us from the animals is our ability to accessorize."
• "The sooner my body wears out, the better off I'll be. I can't get enough grease in my diet!"
• "I don't see plays because I can nap for free at home."
• "Smile! It increases your face value!" (boy - I say this one a lot!)
• "You are evil and must be destroyed!"
• "You know I love you more than my luggage!"
• "You're too twisted for color T.V."
• "Laughter through tears is my favorite emotion!"
• "She could never stay mad at me - she worships the quicksand I walk in."