Church Bulletin Bloopers

I found these and wanted to share them... Some of them brought me to tears I was laughing so hard! Hope you find humor in them.. :)

Actually taken from church bulletins:

• For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery downstairs.
• This afternoon there will be a meeting in the South and North ends of the church. Children will be baptized at both ends." WHAT?
• Pastor is on vacation. Massages can be given to the church secretary." I think I like this one! :)
• Ladies, don't forget the rummage sale. It's a chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping around the house. Don't forget your husbands!
• The sermon this morning, "Jesus Walks on Water". The service this evening: "Searching for Jesus."
• Low self-esteem support group will meet Thursday at 7 to 8:30 pm. Please use the back door.
• Don't let worry kill you - let the church help.
• Tonight's sermon: "What is Hell?" Come early and listen to our choir practice.
• Next Sunday is the family hayride and bonfire at the Fowlers. Bring your own hot dogs and guns. Friends are welcome! Everyone come for a fun time!
• Missionary from Africa speaking at Calvary Memorial Church in Racine. Name: Bertha Belch. Annoucement: Come tonight and hear Bertha Belch all the way from Africa!

and this one is my all-time favorite that I have heard a lot before:

• Weight Watchers will meet at 7pm at the First Presbyterian Church. Please use large double doors at the side entrance.

Hope you enjoyed!! :)

Have a great week!